The Oligarchian Observer/Edition:9

http://wiki.battlemaster.org/images/Oligarchcrestnew.jpg The Oligarchian Observer
Cost: Free, unless, of course, you are Sirionite, Fontanese, or Old Rancaguan	Supreme Master of the Newspaper: Hireshmont, 523 Shiverwoodian Squirrelsspace	Volume: 9
The only newspaper that can laugh at itself!

• THE newspaper for the truth about events on the Oligosirionifontanagua Front of the Great War!
• Disclaimer: This paper DOES NOT represent the official opinions of the Oligarchian government, merely a general accounting for the public.
• Whenever we say, "Facts", what we mean is the explaination which best fits the evidence of action, not words.

Twiddling of the Tumbs

May 16, 2006- Oligarch has a new national sport! Thumbtwiddling! To do it, sit on your bottom. Now, relax... stay relaxed... now clasp your hands about belly-level. Now unclasp your thumbs, and sort of... half rotate them around each other. Boring, eh? I think so too! Now, all of this is to say, nothing much is happenning. We're all kind of wondering, what happens now? DO we sit and wait for the seige, or do we strike back?

Updates From the Cell

May 13, 2006- Well, first there was dullness. Westmoor keeps getting TOs on it, but resisteing them. Its probably resisted about 10 TOs. Then I had scribal errors(OOC- grounded!), so I was out of contact, then I got thrown in prison! Now, rumour tells me, via smuggled copies of the Rampant Lion, that the Westmoorlians have, at last, fallen. I bet we will see a new Coimbra soon. Now Oligarch stands surrounded, without aid. Is this the end? I hope to be able to continue reporting, but I dont know if I will be able, from the confines of my cell.

Continuing Conflict in Westmoor

May 2, 2006- I dont know how the Westmoorlians do it. They have no repulsed FOUR TO attempts by Fontanese(or is it Sirionite?) forces. We have continued minimal forces there, as well as peasents waging guerrilla warfare in the streets. The people of Oligarch are strong, but dying. Westmoorlians butchered in the streets, Commonyrians, Oberndorfers, and Greatbridgians reduced to a shadow of their former selves by mass murders of elves and Fontanese, starvation warfare tactics, pillaging of every kind. The inhumanity of the north is disgusting. 30,000 have starved to death in Oligarch, THIRTY THOUSAND. Are there none who can turn their eyes to this tragedy of humankind? can the Yssarians not see that their allies butcher people in the thousands? Can the Itoruntians not see beyond the feud of their northern allies? Can the Ibladeshians not see through divine eyes and take pity on humankind? I appeal to the entire island: Save Oligarch. Sirion and Fontan starve us and butcher the flower of your youth and torture our nobles most brutally. Yes, we do the same, for we can survive no other way. Please, hear the call of that which is right and righteous.

Attack in Oberndorf

May 2, 2006- We attacked Oberndorf earlier today, only to be repulsed. 5000 vs. 6000, no surprise they beat us. Such is the war against tyranny, such is life. We will never surrender, we will never give in.

The End of the War

May 2, 2006- The OCPAU vs. Itorunt Informer war is over. The CC and OO managed to get just over 1000 views each, totalling in at 2100 views, last I checked. The II, it seems, managed about 1100 views on its own... thats 1100 views, for one issue, and 2(or is it 3?) "special issues". The OO still holds the record for the most views of any single issue.

May We Do Well in May

May 1, 2006- Well, its new issue time! With a record-breaking 1063 views last I checked, the Oligarchian Observer April 2006 Volume CRUSHED the Itorunt Informer, and its Special Issues. The CC did as well, with 1024 views I believe. That ends the II vs. OCPAU war, with us the definitive victors! In this coming month, may we all work, hope, and pray for the success of Oligarch.