Outer Tilog (Realm)/OTCCFPTRS
Press Release
Outer Tilog Ministry of Entertainment & Tourism
For Immediate Release
The Outer Tilog Ministry of Entertainment & Tourism is proud to announce the opening of the Outer Tilog Cultural Center for Facial Piercing, Tattooing and Ritual Scarification (OTCCFPTRS).
While we have a proud centuries-old tradition of self-mutilation here in Outer Tilog, it has been something of a cottage industry. Sadly, many of the great masters have passed beyond this world without ever training a successor (maybe we should cut back a bit on the barbecues?). Because of this disturbing trend, one of the great cultural features of our land is in jeopardy.
The Ministry of Entertainment & Tourism has, at great expense, established a cultural center dedicated to preserving and restoring these great arts to their past glory. We have rounded up as many master artists as we could catch, hamstrung them and ensconced them in comfortable antiseptic cells on the OTCCFPTRS main campus. We are currently collecting children who still have both eyes and hands intact to serve as appretices. While this task is proving to be more difficult than expected, I am confident that we can dig up sufficient numbers to ensure the continued existence of this great Tilogian art form.
A secondary benefit to the establishment of the center is that we now have sufficient numbers of trained tattooists in the capitol to fully implement the serf serial number tattooing program. So everyone please bring in all your peasants to be tattooed and registered as your property. Protect your investment, register and tattoo your serfs today!
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UPDATE
Press Release
Outer Tilog Ministry of Entertainment & Tourism
For Immediate Release
The Outer Tilog ME&T is proud to announce the opening of the new Recycled Vegetable Peeler Wing at the Outer Tilog Cultural Center for Facial Piercing, Tattooing and Ritual Scarification (affectionately known as the OTCCFPTRS).
This great project is the culmination of a years-long search for an acceptable use of an ever-growing collection of confiscated vegetable peelers in the ME&T warehouses. ME&T bureaucrats have been more successful than expected in their enforcement of Section 86192.531 of the Outer Tilogian Code ("Any vegetables you have must be given as a burnt offering to Ghon-shugoth, Winged Flea God of Jealousy"). Possession of a vegetable peeler is, of course, a tacit admission of guilt. Dutiful ME&T bureaucrats have, in the course of their regular peasant hovel inspections, discovered a great number of offenders and confiscated their vegetable peelers before consigning the serfs to the tender mercies of the Ministry of Justice. Unfortunately, this has produced an unexpected surplus of these useless household kitchen implements.
Georth Buth, endowed chair of the Surgical Tongue Splitting department of the OTCCFPTRS, had a remarkable and completely unexpected flash of ... well, we won't call it "brilliance" but it did light up the room dimly for a few seconds. Georth proposed using the confiscated peelers to "erase" the beginning tattooing students' assignments by peeling the subject peasants' newly-tattooed skin off. After a liberal application of salt and a couple of weeks to heal, the peasants/canvases were blank and ready for another semester under the ink.
The ME&T is proud to have implemented Georth's idea with the opening of the new Wing. All Tilogian nobles are invited to the grand opening of the Georth Buth Memorial Recycled Vegetable Peeler Wing next Tuesday. Complimentary punch and kick ... er ... cake will be provided.
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