Melhed/History/Age of Blood/Liners

Sometimes an event can be summarized by a single line, something that captures the very point of that moment in time. Alas usually these things are just inside jokes, and cheesy one liners, but sometimes they can say a lot about the people who have since left us.

Age of Mystery

• "So long as there is breath in my body, no evil shall touch the walls of Agyr and live to tell the tale!" - Pontifex Argos, 30 minutes before his death.

• "You know what I hate about mystery? It’s so damn mysterious and to top it off smug about it. I mean it’s not all that surprising how it happened, some people were stupid and now we’ve got nothing about that era. You know just once I’d like to find an Age of Mystery that wasn’t caused by the same damn thing, just once." - Veber Klotz, about the Age of Mystery during the Age of Reason

Rise of the Mercenaries

• "The problem with mercenaries is that they need to be paid to start fighting. And, unless you are very lucky, you end up paying them even more to stop." - Aldo Unti, Soldier, comment on the rise of the mercenaries.

Age of Blood

• "If you are the last man standing, you're not fighting hard enough." - Emperor Tsu

• "Beatings will continue until moral improves." - Emperor Tsu

• "How do I do it? Why, my axiom. People are stupid. Remember that and you can do anything." - Emperor Tsu

• "You should ban everyone who's name starts with 'J' and ends in 'osh'" - Grand General Koban, Speaking of El Cid Rogala

• • "What! Jarbosh! Here?" - Morgan Darby, Soldier.

• • "Also I must say we have a great general, even though I know he doesn't trust me, that means he's one of the smart ones." - El Cid Rogala, When Grand General Koban came to be re-elected

• "You know what this place needs, ninjas..... think about it." - Andro the Assassin

• "I don't know how they do it, but the tax ninjas always find us no matter how far we roam." - Aldo Unti, Soldier

• "You are all ordered to party down, that is all." - Emperor Tsu, making sure people use their down time properly

• "Other nations have elections, we have rebellions; the result is the same." - Morgan Darby, Soldier

• "I'd say he doesn't administer a reign of terror, just the occasional light shower." - Durak the Merchant, about the Emperor

• "Warning! Do not use beheading axe as a back scratcher. Do not use beheading axe as a toothbrush. Keep out of the reach of children and Tsu. Harmful if contact with skin or eyes. Do not swallow or juggle. If accident occurs contact a mortician immediately." - Warning Label on the Emperor's Beheading Axe

Defensive Alliance War

• "What do you mean we weren't at war yet?" - Grand General Aldo, eve after intercepting the invasion force.

• "You may have beaten us this time, but we've only to march a few miles to re-supply, while you have to walk for a month. We will return tomorrow and the next day, and the day after that; we will keep coming until there is nothing left of you but blood and ashes." - Emperor Tsu Sun, After the Charge of the Berserkers

• "Fronen's name for the war:Restarted the re-invasion of Melhed, another time, once again, II" - Bob Baceolus

• "Defending your home town from the evil of Melhed one pillage, rape, burn at a time! Wether you know it or not they're comming for you!" - Fronenite soldier

• "Saving Melhed from the monsters and undead by "helping" them run their regions" - Fronenite soldier

• "The way I see it, if we rape every Melite then eventually the whole country will be free of Tsu's evil since they'll be part of our country." - unknown Enweil noble.

• "The defensive alliance is in place to protect all members from invasion of hostile powers. Especially those hostile powers across the continent before they have made, thought about making, or considered contact with the the defensive member." - Ironic words of an unknown Meshian noble, was punished for uttering them

• "We are here to stop you from destroying our homes!" ~Meshian battle cry at the war start
  • "Who are you, seriously?" - Melite reply

• "Tsu is a tyrannical, brutal, despot. He's a burden on the people of Melhed who are used to the conforting incopatince that only I could provide." - Highguard Tezokian

• "Melhed provides continental unity on Beluaterra by being the focal point of all the hatred of all the other realms." - Unknown(possibly Highguard Tezokian)

• Melite Bureaucrat:
  • "We provide a public service, without us who would everyone hate?"
  • "We provide a public service, without us our enemies would get fat from sitting around."
  • "We provide a public service, without us Highguard would have to blame himself."

• "Government got you down? Superiors a bunch of jerks? Had enough? Then hold a rebellion! Call 555-Melhed for all your rebelious needs." - Advertisment sent to all nations

• "Need a new ruler? We can supply you with a one that is insane, crazy, useless, or from an enemy realm out to destroy you. If so then we can fill your needs and will contact our supplier, Fronen, for one." - Advertisment sent to all nations

Age of Reason

• "Morgan, we have a palace made of solid gold, since when do we spend wisely?" - Prime Minister Aldo Unti

• "Stupidity remains man's single greatest adversary... and it has won the day." - Veber Klotz

• "Rock on Melhed, Rock on!" - Kokomaro, King of Rock, at the founding of Valentia

• "We're a reasonable people; well as reasonable as you can get living in the coldest, most inhospitable, stretch of land anywhere on the continent, fighting a war of genocide against enemies that can't be defeated." - Dyan Twix, Vanquisher

• "So you see, though these days ours is a land of enlightenment and reason, our people are also a savage lot who will do what it takes to survive. It is our duty to protect the peasants, as a whole, and sometimes that means that individuals have to die." - Aldo Unti

Age of Betrayal

• "Whenever we gain a step we seem to loose the stairs." - Dorgund Miles, Minister of Defense of Melhed

• "That which doesn't kill us, doesn't matter." - Aldo Unti, Consul of Melhed

• "The senate is moving at it's normal speed ... vacation!" - Consuasor Bob Baceolus of Lin Helon