Fairytales Family/Looking good on any occasion
"Monsters.. Mylady.. monsters they killed my husband..", the old women whined.
Fainche made her hair. Monster is Saex. Certainly, that was bad news. And eating up the Santoros poor peasants was not good news for .. Santoro. There was still this fashion show she had to attend to.
"Monsters.. Mylady.. monsters ate my baby..!", the old women cried.
Fainche sighed. Eating babies from Santoros poor peasants was bad news.. for the population growth. But peasants were peasants. And besides, there was was something wrong with heir hair color.
"Minsters.. Mylady.. terrible looking monsters.."
Fainche stopped making her hair. Slowly turning around to the old women, she asked:
"Did You just say terrible looking monsters?"
Half an hour later, the infantry unit Banner of the Dragon was on the way to Saex.
After she had finished her letter, Fainche commanded her scribe to bring it to the military conclave.
My beloved Queen,
My men are in bad shape. I have lost most of my cosmetics, mirrors, shavers, in Lambresi, and the short supplies in Remton do not guarantee me that I can fill up my units most vital equipment in the next days.
I have heard marvelous stories about great gold treasures, gold treasures in Ethalian and Sartanian lands. Treasures, that could be used for the clothing of the entire Arcaean Army, treasures like combs, toothbrushes, parfumes of any kind. And they are all hidden, so these marvelous stories say, in the houses of ethalian and sartanian Lords.
Hereby I request, my Queen, with all my respect, a exclusive licence to loot.
Your mostgood looking troop leader and follower,
Fainche Fairytales (Dame of Remton)
Fainche looked at her comb. It lookek broken. But it was not. The new derranged collection from Remton looked really weird - and was expensive, for her coffers were empty again..
These were terrible times.
She sighed and remembered the great days at the tournament in Idapur. Drinking, dancing and chatting with the other nobles brought her back to life. She also made it to the third round in the tournament, beating some more experienced knights in swordfighting.
And celebrating her achievement, she drank a lot of Idapur Gin, a drink that Baron Frostnova recommended to her. Inspired by it's fiery ingredients, she had composed a letter to the lords and knights of the tournament, trying to explain the terrible state Arcaea was in and the boring political structure of the far east.
But then the big of the world started to complain. Her Queen thought she, a small hero from Remton, wanted to sabotage the Arcaean politics, her sister Florence from the diplomatic council was mad at her for adressing Lasanar as the bad guy. But how in the world could she had known it, when all that the Arcaean history books say is that Lasanar is the evil Goliath in the north? Even those educated Thymes and well-travelled Krawolgas did not know that Arcaea had friends in Lasanar. And why was there no news from Florence and the Council of Foreign affairs?
Fainche took another gulp of wine.
A wormtongue. Pah. She would challenge Vulpes for that - to the death, of course. One day, this poor man should see the truth.. the truth, that most of those rulers of the Far East were old farts hiding between seals and contracts, alliances and federations, and all those other things making life on this side of the world more boring for a simple noble. No Fairytale can be kept locked up for long.
Another gulp of wine went into Fainche stomach, when a messenger entered the tent.
"Lady Fairytales, there is a package for Your from Santoro Thyme."
"A package from Santoro Thyme?", Fainche asked surprised. "That it interesting. Bring it in!"
Two minutes later, Fainche was looking at 25 bonds from what she thought was her admirer. If just had the time, she would make a visit at the Blue Street in Remton, where the masters of whool, cotton and iron resided.
Finally, the Banner of the Dragon arrived in Lasop. The men were demoralized. Allmost half of the units equipment was lost, broken or had been stolen. With mites in their field cushions, broken combs, a missing fingernail tweezers the spirit of the once so valiant men sank into dark, bottomless pits. Even the unit healer, Dr. Vlad, started to mumble about bad payment and smoked away most of the units healing herbs.
That, however, changed in the first hours of their stay in Lasop, for Fainche Fairytales had received a huge amout of money from the Krawolga, Thyme and Crownguard family to bring her unit back to combat duty.
"Men! You fought greatly! And You hanged many peasants! Now it is the time to rejoice! Let us have some fun here in Lasop .. therefore, I command You to go dancing."
"Yipee!" screamed a dirty soldiers.
"Hurray", yelled another dirty stinking soldier.
Fainche then commenced with her speech: "In addition, we will visit the local swimming pool, get new haircuts, buy new uniforms and auxilary field equipement, and we will order new uniforms ..."
And so Fainche Fairytales spent 53 gold pieces in just 8 hours.
In her camp in Lambresi, Fainche Fairytales was reading the latest Battlermaster Vogue. Her new fashion advisor, Pierre le Fou, had suggested her to read the article about a new hot combat uniform. It was rumoured that it had it's origins in the far Caligan Empire. How it came to Arcaea it was not clear yet. Rumours were saying that a rich trader brought it along. Other rumours were claiming that a foreign troop commander was sighted wearing these clothes in Remton.
Foreign troop commander or not, these new uniforms looked quite good.
"Albert?"
"Yes, Mylady."
"Travel to Remton and order one set of Caligini Uniforms for me and the entire unit."
"Of course, Mylady."
"And make haste. I do not want to fight another battle with this rubbles. The man also may start complaining."
"I will, Mylady."
With that Albert started his journey to Remton, seeking the new hot infantry uniforms.
