Confederate Vindicator/Issue 1

Confederate Vindicator
Price: Free! Written Hamilton Vita.	Vindicating ourselves from Fontanese lies!	July Edition

Sabotage of Paper!

Only a few minutes ago a servant wearing Neptune Arthur Slasher coat-of-arms was caught changing the print type of the newspaper to make his owner look good. Unfortunately, he got away with a few copies of the paper before he could be apprehended.

This both proves Neptune Arthur Slasher's low character in sabotaging the newspaper of another realm and his continued aggression against free speech. That is, continued aggression against free speech even after having me banned. Apparently he feels he must sabotage our newspaper. Surely one who had nothing to hide would have no reason to take this course of action?

Fontan's Vile and Unwarranted Violence

Fontan proclaims free speech for its nobles, yet its nobles oddly deny it for others. How can this be? Perhaps enemies are considered unnoble to Fontan? Which would make sense considering their past record of electing nobles to regions instead of fulfilling rightful claims and their constant aggression to other realms. And they've wanted to have dukes face re-election. What anarchy is this? With this precedent a duke's land rights mean nothing. This will cause regular lords to no longer value a duke's position. After that, a lord's land rights may be violated through election. The next step is peasants voting for a lord and voting one of their own kind in office. The horrors of the anarchy they preach!

Not only does Fontan deny free speech, they do it in a violent, irrational manner. Fontan banned me from their realm. I did not choose to leave. I merely spoke my mind. And yet they have the gall to call me a traitor and call for my execution? They have violated the very thing they purport to hold sacred!

Anyway, behold the messages themselves:

You may have escaped this time Hamilton, but I will enjoy the day I catch you and finally silence your incessant prattling by removing your vile tongue.

Malfurion Stormrage Count of Commonyr, Marshal of the Fontan Rangers

Indeed this Hamilton wags his mouth too much. He should be lifting his sword instead.

Theros Landre (Knight of Al Amarah)

You have no sense of loyalty at all and to me everyone in CoF is a treacherous dog.

Neptune Arthur Slasher (Knight of Oligarch)

Hamilton, I do not order you. I am just asking you nicely to hang yourself to save our executors a lot of trouble. Besides it would be a waste of a good piece of rope.

Neptune Arthur Slasher (Knight of Oligarch)

Neptune Arthur Slasher's logic is a bit lacking in that last letter. How will hanging myself, as he wishes, be a waste of a good piece of rope? He must either petition my hanging or the saving of good rope, not both. But irregardless of his bad logic, I would agree that my hanging would be a waste of a good piece of rope because my execution is unnecessary.

And if I were to be executed, I am a nobleman and a hanging is a commoner's death! I deserve a beheading by sword should a court find my execution necessary. But considering the state of Fontan's judicial system, I doubt there can be a fair trial in their lands.

Vindicator of the Confederates

Today is the beginning of the Confederate Vindicator. I have established this paper to protect our reputation from the lies of those who claim to govern the Fontanese. I am the first of my family to take up newspaper writing since those of Aurum Bishamon, Sephirah Bishamon, and Zeluioj Bishamon. I only hope that I am as successful as they were.