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==Quotes from #battlemaster @ quakenet==
 
==Quotes from #battlemaster @ quakenet==
 +
=== July 20, 2010 ===
 +
<pre>[11:12] <+Lauren> time to go beat up my boyfriend
 +
[11:12] <+Kitanali> >.>
 +
[11:12] * +Kitanali wonders if she should hand Lauren the baseball bat, or the squeaky bat.
 +
[11:12] <+Miriam_office> say a big thank you for him again
 +
[11:13] <+Lauren> hah.... i will... sometime when i'm not so irritated with him
 +
[11:14] <+Lauren> he should have been up like 2 hours ago...i've tried to wake him up multiple times.. and i've expressed my irritation already -_-
 +
[11:14] <+Indirik> I would imagine that, if you get creative, you can think of some ways that will surely wake him up
 +
[11:15] * +Kitanali votes for throwing ice packs at him. :D
 +
[11:15] <+Lauren> i've thought about throwing stuff at him.. but that seems somewhat uncharacteristic for me
 +
[11:15] <+Miriam_office> water
 +
[11:15] <+Miriam_office> :p
 +
[11:15] <+Lauren> anyway... time to go get angry
 +
[11:16] <+Miriam_office> dont be Lauren, is not worthy
 +
[11:16] <+Indirik> Don't get angry, get sexy.
 +
[11:16] <+Lauren> lol
 +
[11:17] <+Lauren> it's not worth it, or he's not worth it XD</pre>
 +
 +
===April 1st 2010===
 +
<pre>[00:28] <}Kai{> wait is that the real tom?
 +
[00:28] <}Kai{> nah, can't be
 +
[00:28] <}Kai{> it's april fools
 +
[00:28] <_Tom_> No, never. I just pretend to be me on the Internet.</pre>
 +
 
===January 2010===
 
===January 2010===
 
<pre>* +Stabbity kicks the door in and hugtackles Lauren
 
<pre>* +Stabbity kicks the door in and hugtackles Lauren
Line 21: Line 45:
 
* +Lauren (~Lauren@99-28-15-122.lightspeed.iplsin.sbcglobal.net) Quit (Signed off)
 
* +Lauren (~Lauren@99-28-15-122.lightspeed.iplsin.sbcglobal.net) Quit (Signed off)
 
<+Andrew^> She's not ready.</pre>
 
<+Andrew^> She's not ready.</pre>
===November 2009===
 
<pre><Andrew|Kotor> oszero hooked me up with the crack he uses and it seems to work</pre>
 
===October 2009===
 
<pre>* Sacha sucks Lauren's doorknob
 
<Lauren> my eye just literally started twitching</pre>
 
===July 2009===
 
<pre>[03:50] <EthanLeeVita> I hired a friend to haunt you though
 
[03:50] <EthanLeeVita> his name is Jeff Dolmer
 
[03:50] <Dave`>  Phew.
 
[03:50] <Dave`>  I thought you were about to say Jeff Madsen.</pre>
 
===June 2009===
 
<pre>Oszero> Tom is a bigger geek that Sacha and Andrew combined
 
<Lauren> lol
 
<Lauren> + dean
 
<Sacha> i'm f'in gangsta, dude
 
<Lauren> dean you're a geek too
 
<Lauren> esp. with the wow
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
* Sacha shoots Oszero, holding his gun sideways
 
<Oszero> HAHA
 
<Oszero> you come from belgum...
 
<The1exile> look at me I'm a gangster I hold my gun sidewyas
 
<Sacha> i buss' a cap in yo' ass!
 
<Oszero> ive done sheets more gangster than your country..
 
<Lauren> belgum.. sounds like a drug company
 
* The1exile flaunts his sideways holding gun skillz
 
<Oszero> lol
 
<Lauren> that's ironic
 
<Oszero> lmao
 
<Lauren> lmfao
 
<Sacha> yeah, but you havent outdone me :P
 
* Lauren is laughing for the first time since.. wait.. no.. earlier today
 
<Oszero> time ot request to Tom that theres an archery tourament.. i mean.. shooting sideways...
 
<Oszero> xD
 
<Oszero> >.>
 
<Lauren> dave made me laugh with his bzzzing
 
<Oszero> <.<
 
<Dave`> lol
 
<Dave`> :)
 
<The1exile> Oszero: you mean... like... a crossbow?
 
<The1exile> xD
 
<Lauren> my dad was looking at my really funnily dave :P
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
<Lauren> i had to explain that there was an inside wasp joke
 
<The1exile> "my bow is so gangster it shoots sideways normally"
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
<Sacha> lol
 
<Lauren> oh!
 
<Sacha> bonus points because you can fire one with one hand
 
<Dave`> :O
 
<Lauren> archery!
 
<The1exile> in fact I think there should be a gun that fires guns that fire sideways
 
<Sacha> and thus can go akimbo
 
<Lauren> i was talking bout that with andrew today
 
<De-Legro> you can shoot some bows sideways, not sure if its a good idea though
 
<Oszero> lol
 
<The1exile> so that no-one has an excuse for not firing guns in ganster ways
 
* Lauren has done archery before
 
<Lauren> i lurves it
 
<Oszero> there is one!!!
 
<The1exile> I WANTS IT
 
<Lauren> my aim sucks.. but i love it :)
 
<Oszero> its called a fully auto AK :P
 
<Sacha> but a ballista trums a crossbow
 
<Sacha> thats like firing a bazooka sideways
 
<Oszero> lol
 
<The1exile> the AK doesn't fire guns foo
 
<Sacha> doesnt get more gangsta than that
 
<De-Legro> I hate archery, but thats becuase I could never work out how not to hit my arm with the string :(
 
<Oszero> LOL mien does!!
 
<Oszero> De-Legro: thats why you should be given a bracer xD
 
<The1exile> that's true sacha but then some cool gangster is going to come up and pop a stone in yo ass and say you're compensating for something
 
* Dave` 's gun fires in all directions. >.>
 
<Aerywyn> http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o178/therandominsane/twilightshoopcopy.jpg
 
<Oszero> and you have to hold the bow at a slight angle xD
 
<Sacha> who cares what they say
 
<Sacha> ive got a freaking ballista
 
<Aerywyn> Are we talking stone ages?
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
<Oszero> nice one jake
 
* Aerywyn gets in his chariot.
 
<De-Legro> my school was too cheap to provide bracers, plus the instructor was of the opinion that they created bad habits
 
<Sacha> raptor vampires?
 
<The1exile> AHA
 
<The1exile> I have exposed the weakness in the ballista plans
 
<Oszero> Are you serious?!?
 
<Oszero> Say that when youre missing flesh from your forearm
 
<The1exile> you see if you google "f*cking ballista" the first result tells you "sometimes even a headshot with a f*cking ballista isn't enough to get a one-hit kill."
 
<The1exile> clearly not gangster
 
<The1exile> in fact...
 
<The1exile> what you need is drive by ballista shooting
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
<Aerywyn> Hmmm...
 
<The1exile> which is basically what warships are for
 
<Oszero> a ballista attached to a ford escort
 
<Sacha> or... get a motorized ballista
 
<Oszero> xD
 
<Aerywyn> Well...
 
<Aerywyn> Chariots kinda too.
 
<Sacha> do a 90 degree spin
 
<Sacha> shoot
 
<Aerywyn> But they arent as acccurate
 
<The1exile> therefore admiral = ORIGINAL GANGSTER
 
<Sacha> and drive off
 
<Hroppa> Ballista on a chariot?
 
* Lauren shoots people with arrows
 
<Lauren> muahahahaha
 
* Aerywyn laughs.
 
<Hroppa> What do you think Pirates are?
 
<Oszero> umm
 
<Sacha> awesome?
 
<Oszero> awesome?
 
<Oszero> LOL
 
<The1exile> Oszero: I have a ford escort get me a ballista and we're in business
 
<Sacha> ...
 
<Oszero> HIVEMIND
 
<The1exile> in fact, get me two
 
<Sacha> WE ARE ONE</pre>
 
 
===May 2009===
 
====May 05====
 
<pre>[21:13] <DorianGray> You know you're addicted to bm when you pass over a topless girl in favour of rp?</pre>
 
===March 2009===
 
====March 03====
 
<pre>[13:35] * +Wimpie looks away
 
[13:40] * +DorianGray looks at Wimpie looking away
 
[13:40] * +ELV doesn't look at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away
 
[13:40] * +DorianGray doesn't know ELV isn't looking at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away, because he's looking away
 
[13:42] * +ELV doesn't know DorianGray doesn't know ELV isn't looking at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away, because he's not looking at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away
 
[13:43] <+Wimpie> yay for useless convo's
 
[13:43] * +DorianGray doesn't care that ELV doesn't know DorianGray doesn't know ELV isn't looking at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away, because he doesn't care to look at ELV not looking at DorianGray looking at Wimpie looking away</pre>
 
===January 2009===
 
====January 20====
 
<pre>[12:50] <Jared_Artemesia> but in time the daimon breasts shall be mine
 
[12:50] <Delvin_at_Work> ...unless Prudent gets lightning bolted before you get the chance
 
[12:50] <Sacha> eh?
 
[12:51] <Jared_Artemesia> that would just be cruel to deny Jared his daimon boobs
 
[12:51] <Delvin_at_Work> I've informed Tom of the Daimon's player's belief that he has been appointed sole arbiter of who is allowed to live and who must die on Beluaterra
 
[12:51] <Sacha> lol
 
[12:51] <ELV> hahaa
 
[12:51] <ELV> nice delvin
 
[12:51] <Jared_Artemesia> doesn't delvin play prudent though?
 
[12:51] * ELV cheers wildly
 
[12:51] <Delvin_at_Work> ah...no
 
[12:51] <ELV> I may join riombara JUST for that
 
[12:51] <Delvin_at_Work> I play *Delvin*
 
[12:52] <Jared_Artemesia> huh
 
[12:52] <Jared_Artemesia> so who DOES play Prudent?
 
[12:52] <Jared_Artemesia> I thought it was you...?
 
[12:52] <Delvin_at_Work> the Daimons' player
 
[12:52] <Delvin_at_Work> nope
 
...
 
[12:58] <Thalathafn> you thought you were trying to touch timothy's boobs?</pre>
 
 
====January 16====
 
<pre>[13:22] <Thalathafn> bye
 
[13:22] * Ta|i waves
 
[13:22] * Ta|i has left #battlemaster
 
[13:22] <ELV> bye
 
[13:22] <ELV> damn
 
[13:24] <Reilwin> ELV: you FAIL
 
[13:24] <ELV> :'(
 
[13:24] <ELV> you big bully!
 
[13:25] <Reilwin> o.O
 
[13:25] <Reilwin> I'm not a bully!
 
[13:25] <Reilwin> A really bully would do something like this:
 
[13:25] * Reilwin slaps ELV around a little bit with a large trout
 
[13:25] <Reilwin> oh, say
 
[13:25] <Reilwin> that was fun
 
[13:25] <A8mew> People and trouts.
 
[13:25] * Reilwin slaps ELV around a little bit with a large trout ...again!
 
[13:25] * Reilwin slaps ELV around a little bit with a large trout ...and again!
 
[13:26] * ELV fights the big bully
 
[13:26] <Reilwin> :P
 
[13:26] <A8mew> Ever think of using a mackerel?
 
[13:26] * ELV slaps Reilwin with an umbilical cord
 
[13:26] <Reilwin> oh, good idea
 
[13:27] * Reilwin slaps ELV around a little bit with a large mackerel
 
[13:27] * ELV strangles Reilwin with reilwin's umbilical cord
 
[13:27] <Reilwin> o.O
 
[13:27] * ELV shoves reilwin's placenta down his throat for good measure
 
[13:28] <Reilwin> O.o
 
[13:28] <Reilwin> My, violent, aren't we?
 
[13:28] <A8mew> That's... unique.
 
[13:28] * Reilwin wonders who is the bully here...
 
[13:28] <A8mew> I've ground people into jelly and marketed it as a cure for cancer,
 
but never have I tried strangulation by umbilical cord.
 
[13:29] <Reilwin> the victim's own umbilical cord, no less
 
[13:29] <Veritek> That takes some prior planning
 
[13:29] <Veritek> Long distance planning....
 
[13:29] <ELV> muahaha
 
[13:30] <Reilwin> Veritek: well, you can do it as soon as a baby's born...
 
[13:30] <Reilwin> hmm...wonder what that makes ELV
 
[13:30] <Reilwin> baby-killer?
 
[13:30] <Reilwin> hum
 
[13:30] <Veritek> Yeah, but that's not that impressive
 
[13:30] <Veritek> impressive is saving it until they're 45, then *then* doing it
 
...
 
[13:32] * Delvin_at_Work nudges Veritek and points at his jar</pre>
 
 
====January 14====
 
<pre><Lorgan> I just lost a whole letter due to misclicking :(
 
* Aonui laughs.</pre>
 
 
====January 13====
 
<pre>[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> i did something very funny the other day
 
[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> we were out
 
...
 
[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> and she touched my leg
 
[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> and i screamed rape
 
[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> ....
 
[12:52] <ELV> haha
 
[12:52] <Von-Ulthuan> then she's like shut up out of the corner of her mouth
 
[12:52] <DorianGray> lol
 
[12:53] <DorianGray> lol she hates you
 
[12:53] <DorianGray> sorry
 
[12:53] <Von-Ulthuan> and i'm like looking down and going ok ok whatever you say just don't hit me
 
[12:53] <DorianGray> screaming rape is one of the fastest ways to turn a situation awkward
 
[12:53] <Von-Ulthuan> yes but it was totally worth it
 
[12:53] <Von-Ulthuan> :)
 
[12:53] <Sacha> the fastest way is to actually rape her
 
[12:54] <DorianGray> +1 for sacha
 
[12:54] <ELV> lol@sacha
 
[12:54] <Von-Ulthuan> imagine that would be quite awekward
 
[12:54] <ELV> in fact, lmfao
 
[12:54] <ELV> "wait...oops?"
 
[12:54] <ELV> 'I meant to hug you!"
 
...
 
[12:54] <DorianGray> "oh that just slipped right up in there didn't it?"
 
[12:54] <Von-Ulthuan> "but i slipped</pre>
 
  
====January 4====
+
===March 2010===
<pre>[19:15] <+Sacha> Used during Medieval Times, the Pear of Anguish was
+
<i>March 18, 2010</i>
an extremely painful device used to punish homosexuals, witches and
+
<pre>[20:28] <Prat> I mean, what?
women accused of inducing a miscarriage.
+
[20:28] <Prat> xD
The Pear of Anguish had the shape of a pear; As a handle was turned,  
+
[20:28] <Vita> haha
the spoon-shaped lobes opened; increasing pain.
+
[20:29] <Vita> I think I'd prefer that to what you may not have originally mewant
Even though the Pear of Anguish was mostly used for oral punishments,  
+
[20:29] <Vita> if they are both jerking off, it at least means they are getting along.
homosexuals had it fixed in their anus and women in their vagina.
+
[20:29] <Vita> despite the...awkwardness of the getting along.
Causing severe pain, after this torture was employed on the mouth;
+
[20:29] <Prat> Well you hope so :p
the victim's teeth would get destroyed;
+
[20:29] <Prat> maybe getting along a little too well
making blood pour out of the victim's mouth often causing death.
+
[20:29] * Octavius has joined #battlemaster
If introduced in the anus or vagina, death was a step away.
+
[20:29] * Q sets mode: +v Octavius
The Pear of Anguish was rarely washed, thus causing infections
+
[20:29] <Vita> well, what else would happen
very frequently. If the victim didn't die by an infection however,
+
[20:29] <Vita> masturbing towawrds each other?
he would die by other diseases caused by the severe damage of his
+
[20:29] <Vita> to fight
or her intestines.
+
[20:29] <Vita> "I'll cum on you before you cum on me!"
[19:16] <Thalathafn> ouch
+
[20:30] <Prat> honestly if a cop pulls someone over and starts masturbating with them, i probably have even less confidence in that cop than if they're just jerks and wave their gun around or something
[19:16] <Thalathafn> they should really wash it
+
[20:30] <Prat> between waving their gun and waving their penis, i''ll take the gun
[19:17] <+Sacha> to make the torture more humane? :p
+
[20:30] <Vita> this is going to be quoteworthy an\drew
[19:17] <Thalathafn> especially if they are using it for both ends
+
[20:30] <Prat> :p
[19:17] <+Sacha> im guessing that if theres an expanding pear up your ass,  
+
[20:30] <Vita> and you['ll yet again want the topic to be open
cleanliness is the least of your concern</pre>
+
[20:30] <Vita> but
 +
[20:30] * Vita would rather take the penis.
 +
[20:30] * Prat whines a little about not being able to put that in the topic
 +
[20:31] <Octavius> clearly i chose the wrong time to join the channel
 +
[20:31] <Octavius> bye
 +
[20:31] <Vita> you could put it in Quotes, but I'll make damn sure its in context.
 +
[20:31] <Octavius> :p
 +
[20:31] * Octavius has quit IRC (Signed off�)
 +
[20:31] <Vita> http://wiki.battlemaster.org/wiki/IRC/Quotes
 +
[20:31] <Prat> I guess if its just waving around, I'd take the gun, but if it comes down to firing at me, I'd have to go with the penis, though only because its the lesser of the 2 evils</pre>
  
 
==Archived Quotes==
 
==Archived Quotes==
*[[/2006|2006]]
+
*[[/2006/]]
*[[/2007|2007]]
+
*[[/2007/]]
*[[/2008|2008]]
+
*[[/2008/]]
 +
*[[/2009/]]
 
*[[/Falasan|Falasan Quotes]]
 
*[[/Falasan|Falasan Quotes]]
 
*[[/Dev|Dev Channel Quotes]]
 
*[[/Dev|Dev Channel Quotes]]

Latest revision as of 17:30, 20 July 2010

Quotes from #battlemaster @ quakenet

July 20, 2010

[11:12] <+Lauren> time to go beat up my boyfriend
[11:12] <+Kitanali> >.>
[11:12] * +Kitanali wonders if she should hand Lauren the baseball bat, or the squeaky bat.
[11:12] <+Miriam_office> say a big thank you for him again
[11:13] <+Lauren> hah.... i will... sometime when i'm not so irritated with him
[11:14] <+Lauren> he should have been up like 2 hours ago...i've tried to wake him up multiple times.. and i've expressed my irritation already -_-
[11:14] <+Indirik> I would imagine that, if you get creative, you can think of some ways that will surely wake him up
[11:15] * +Kitanali votes for throwing ice packs at him. :D
[11:15] <+Lauren> i've thought about throwing stuff at him.. but that seems somewhat uncharacteristic for me
[11:15] <+Miriam_office> water
[11:15] <+Miriam_office> :p
[11:15] <+Lauren> anyway... time to go get angry
[11:16] <+Miriam_office> dont be Lauren, is not worthy
[11:16] <+Indirik> Don't get angry, get sexy.
[11:16] <+Lauren> lol
[11:17] <+Lauren> it's not worth it, or he's not worth it XD

April 1st 2010

[00:28] <}Kai{> wait is that the real tom?
[00:28]	<}Kai{>	nah, can't be
[00:28]	<}Kai{>	it's april fools
[00:28]	<_Tom_>	No, never. I just pretend to be me on the Internet.

January 2010

* +Stabbity kicks the door in and hugtackles Lauren
* +Andrew^ averts his eyes from this awkward scene
* +Lauren is hugtackled
* +Andrew^ sits down on Lauren's sofa and watches television, eating her food.
* +Stabbity sprawls out on Lauren's bed
* +Andrew^ changes all the radio presets on lauren's stereo and car stereo.
* +Andrew^ leaves the fridge open
* +Stabbity leaves his dirty laundry all over the room
* +Andrew^ thinks its awkward that stabbity took his clothes off, but ignores this..
* +Stabbity doesn't wash his dishes
* +Stabbity clogs the sink
* +Andrew^ plays baseball in the house and breaks 2 lamps and a window
* +Lauren moves out
* +Andrew^ follows
* +Stabbity does too
* +Andrew^ hopes Justin put clothes on first
<+Stabbity> we're preparing you for college life Lauren
* +Lauren (~Lauren@99-28-15-122.lightspeed.iplsin.sbcglobal.net) Quit (Signed off)
<+Andrew^> She's not ready.

March 2010

March 18, 2010

[20:28] <Prat> I mean, what?
[20:28] <Prat> xD
[20:28] <Vita> haha
[20:29] <Vita> I think I'd prefer that to what you may not have originally mewant
[20:29] <Vita> if they are both jerking off, it at least means they are getting along.
[20:29] <Vita> despite the...awkwardness of the getting along.
[20:29] <Prat> Well you hope so :p
[20:29] <Prat> maybe getting along a little too well
[20:29] * Octavius has joined #battlemaster
[20:29] * Q sets mode: +v Octavius
[20:29] <Vita> well, what else would happen
[20:29] <Vita> masturbing towawrds each other?
[20:29] <Vita> to fight
[20:29] <Vita> "I'll cum on you before you cum on me!"
[20:30] <Prat> honestly if a cop pulls someone over and starts masturbating with them, i probably have even less confidence in that cop than if they're just jerks and wave their gun around or something
[20:30] <Prat> between waving their gun and waving their penis, i''ll take the gun
[20:30] <Vita> this is going to be quoteworthy an\drew
[20:30] <Prat> :p
[20:30] <Vita> and you['ll yet again want the topic to be open
[20:30] <Vita> but
[20:30] * Vita would rather take the penis.
[20:30] * Prat whines a little about not being able to put that in the topic
[20:31] <Octavius> clearly i chose the wrong time to join the channel
[20:31] <Octavius> bye
[20:31] <Vita> you could put it in Quotes, but I'll make damn sure its in context.
[20:31] <Octavius> :p
[20:31] * Octavius has quit IRC (Signed off�)
[20:31] <Vita> http://wiki.battlemaster.org/wiki/IRC/Quotes
[20:31] <Prat> I guess if its just waving around, I'd take the gun, but if it comes down to firing at me, I'd have to go with the penis, though only because its the lesser of the 2 evils

Archived Quotes