The Great Family/Vault
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Contents
Scarecrow Torture
Roleplay from Xanio (just in)
Message sent to everyone in your realm (80 recipients)
Xanio sits in his dining hall. A scribe walks up to him and whispers something. Xanio nods and heads off. Walking down the hall of his estate in Axzaloc, he counts slowly. He finally stops at a tapestry, looks around, then walks through. Travelling down the sandstone hallway, deep into the earth, Xanio is guided not by sight, but instinct. He walks quicker, seeing a light, finally reaching a door with a torch. He opens the door slowly, to find a scarecrow in a chair behind a table.
Tell me... where are they?
The scarecrow does nothing... it's a scarecrow
TELL ME!
...
You son of a camel and a particularly prickly prune! Tell me. Where are they.
...
STOP MOCKING ME!
...
Fine, you play rough do ya? What do you say to THIS!?
A scribe in a hood walks in holding a female scarecrow.
Yeah, didn't think I was serious when I said your wife was next, did ya? Now, tell me. And she won't get hurt.
...
Xanio motions to the scribe. He pulls off the fe-scarecrow's hat and pulls her straw hair.
Tell me.
...
The scribe pulls harder
I have greater motivation than this.
The scribe produces a blade
...
Xanio nods. The fe-scarecrow's head falls to the floor.
...
Xanio paces
Hmph. They make you tough over in Kelperstan. Unfortunately, in Talerium we're tougher.
A gang of scribes in hoods rush over to the scarecrow, pinning him down. Xanio pulls out a dagger
Tell me. Where are they?
...
Xanio cuts off the scarecrow's hand
TELL ME!
...
TELL!
Xanio cuts the scarecrow across the chest
Do you need more... persuasion?
...
DON'T MOCK ME!
Xanio walks through a doorway into a torture chamber. The scarecrow, restrained by scribes, follows.
So, what do you want? We can make you stretchy... or perforate you, so you'll pass fluids easier. Maybe you want new eyes?
Xanio rips the hat off the scarecrow
Tell me and it's all over. You can leave. Bury your wife. Tend to your children.
...
Fine.
Scribes file in, holding small scarecrows; they're promptly executed.
Let me revise that. You can leave, bury your wife AND your children!
...
Xanio motions to the scribes. They put the scarecrow on the stretching rack
So it has to be this way? Very well.
A scribe hands Xanio a hot poker. He plunges it into the scarecrow's eyes as it is stretched.
You only did this to yourself.
The scribes throw the scarecrow into a jail cell. Xanio and the scribes leave.
Dump him in Kelperstan in a week. And buy me more scarecrows.
Xanio (Knight of Axzaloc)
Ducks, eggs, chickens, and plates
I had something funny to be put here. But I lsot it. Basically Xanio was cracked out on something, spotuing nonsense
Badger Assault
Eh, ya know. Always gotta pick on good old Xanio! Something about me makes people gang up on me. I blame the schools. And society. But mostly the schools.
Xanio lies down on his doghouse, trying to sleep off his drinks. Underneath him, a small badger peeks his head out.
Ma! It's the strange man who killed uncle Tom!
Mama badger leans out of the doghouse
Let's get him!
YEE HAW!
Dukes of Hazzard music
Xanio screams in terror at the two badgers viscously mauling
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
He rolls off the doghouse, and attempts to rip them off to no avail. Finally, he douses his head in a barrel of ale. A few minutes later, he pulls his head out leaving two inebriated badgers
That was exciting.
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Meanwhile in a corner
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Imagine Vincent Pryce's voice
Hmm. So he has intoxicated my family, killed my brother, and slaughtered my brethren. It is time for Papa Badger to pay him a visit.
The ninja badger flies out of the corner towards Xanio, claws extended. Xanio grabs a wooden spoon, and they fight, throwing tables and such everywhere. Eventually, they find themselves on a cart, speeding towards a cliff.
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"You'll never win!" Xanio cries out, parrying the badger's blow.
"I have nothing to lose. You shall DIE!" The badger strikes once more, furiously scratching with the occasional mauling attempt. Seeing the cliff nearby, Xanio kicks the badger and jumps off the cart...
Papa Badger grabs Xanio's leg, and snarls "You die now."
The cart flies magnificently off the cliff, and as he plummets down, Xanio grabs a well-placed branch.
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A disheveled Xanio walks back into the tavern
Don't worry, it's all under control.
Xanio climbs back onto the doghouse, and goes to sleep.
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Vincent Pryce voice again
Hmm. He thinks he has me. But I'll be back. He better be ready.
Xanio's funeral
Message sent to everyone in your realm (74 recipients) Outside Chocxal, Xanio's body lies wrapped in a purple cloth, embroidered with red and gold. All of his family members that could walk have come. Under the moon in the cool desert air Torsaan speaks, his new robes of purple, red, and yellow swaying in the gentle breeze.
"Tis a shame that we are here today. But it is so. We are here to commemorate the life of Xanio... he was a brother, a son, a cousin, a nephew, and a friend. He died fighting for Talerium, slain by the entire might of Falasan. Bow your heads in prayer to our fallen friend... Karibash, would you like to lead?"
Karibash stands, wearing a white robe. "Ahem... Xanio, b'xanio ka hab. Thsunuk ke aito ka aitoget newtsakanti feh-sunuk'ka. Feh-Xanio habi."
Everyone raises their head. Torsaan lights a stick of incense, and swirls the smoke around Xanio's body.
"Let it be known, that Xanio's true name is... Xanio."
The attendees begin murmuring to each other.
"Yes, it is strange. But let Xanio forever forth be known as... Xanio."
Torsaan smiles wryly at Karibash then Xanio's body. He pulls out a small packet of herbs, and sprinkles it on the cloth. Whispering a prayer.
"And it is so. Xanio's spirit now rests with the gods. This shell shall be disposed of as Xanio wished, placed in the desert. Father, shall you assist us?"
Karibash, Torsaan, and Bah-bah-kar-i unwrap Xanio. Lifting his body carefully, they put it on the ground.
"Let this shell be returned to the earth, for the soul is returned to heaven."
Torsaan leads the congregation back towards Chocxal, leading a solemn chant.
An old friend
Xanio stands in formation, at the front of his unit. The motte and bailey of Amdor stand before him. Charging forward, he leads his men to a seige engine. They climb the engine, hacking and slashing at the Falasani troops. Xanio dances through them, a whirlwind of fury. But Falasan gains the upper hand. A sword slices through Xanio's arm. Crying in agony, he and the rest of his unit are kicked off the wall. The seige engines are burned, and Xanio stands in front of the wall, accompanied by only one unit from Barony of Makar. Xanio smiles. He screams, leading his men forward. They climb the wall, being picked off one at a time by arrows. He and a small contigent of his unit scale the wall to face the might of the Kingdom of Falasan. Xanio sighs, and closes his eyes. He lunges forward, and flicks his wrist ripping out a man's insides. Wheeling around, he bends down onto his head, slicing a few feet around him. Sitting back up, Xanio drops begins to dance. Skipping through the crowd, he gets small cuts, eventually getting deeper until his sword dance cannot go anymore. With a final roar of victory, Xanio grabs the first few Falasani he can, and jumps off the wall. Sailing through the air Xanio hums a song to calm himself. He hits the ground, instantly crushing the Falasani under him. Arrows pile into his back. Standing up, Xanio attempts to hobble back behind Talerium lines. But Papa Badger sails through the air, stabbing Xanio through the heart.
"Victory is mine."
What you talkin bout Willis!?
Karibash scratches his nose. "Come on Torsaan, bowl already!" Karibash taps the bat against the ground, and looks up expectantly. Torsaan and Karibash are playing a game of cricket with some children in the courtyard of the Chocxal temple.
"Get ready to get out!" Torsaan jogs up and bowls with a bit of speed at Karibash. Karibash easily flicks the ball away, past a child who runs after it.
"Why do you always insist on playing cricket?" Karibash asks Torsaan with just a tinge of annoyance.
"Because cricket, is phenomenal. It's more fun to play on grass, you're actually missing out." Torsaan catches the ball, and begins his starting jog.
"Ooo, what a shame." Karibash chuckles as Torsaan bowls the ball a bit faster; he clips it up over a child who lazily tries to catch it. "I still think soccer is better."
Torsaan laughs, "Soccer? No way. It's a bunch of guys kicking a ball around. Cricket is much more elegant."
Karibash shakes his head. "Even your own son prefers soccer. Kartet! Get yourself over here." Kartet runs over to Karibash. "What do you prefer, cricket or soccer? Soccer, right?"
Kartet looks around. "Um... they're both fine?"
Torsaan looks in shock, "What you talkin bout Willis!? We both know you LOVE cricket and think soccer is just silly."
"Er..."
Karibash shakes his head again, "No, I know you love soccer. Cricket is just too lazy of a sport."
"But..."
Karibash and Torsaan then begin arguing over who Kartet should listen to.
"Cricket is lazy!"
"Soccer has no subtleties!!"
"If I may speak..."
"Then speak!" Karibash and Torsaan both shout.
"They're both fine sports." Kartet looks between the two.
"Your son is stupid."
"Because he talks to YOU too much."
Torsaan and Karibash start laughing.
Comments here, if you wish. Long drawn out discussions go into the Talk Page
I really enjoyed that. Nice RP. Next time I meet one of your characters in a realm I care about (not Toren, it was just a place to gain H/P for me) -- Shenron
