The Giblot Gestapo Gazette/Issue 15
 The Giblot Gestapo Gazette
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| Issue 15 | More amusing than a Tilogian in a jar! | 5 Gold |
| May Edition | ||
| Confusion leads to foolish asault on Hilly Holes | |
Giblot's legendary fool MGRHA, led an assault on Hilly Holes personally today after suffering another of his sadly frequent bouts of insanity. Sadly he managed to hoodwink a few young Nobles and his very own brother to come fight with him in a a battle not officially sanctioned by the current general, Orlak Karantatek. In the orders MGRHA gave to the offending troopleaders, he claimed the reason for the attack was boredom! How he dare claim this when he has a region choc full of dissidents that need to be executed and tortured for their crimes we simply don't know. I mean come on, does he have a functioning torture chamber or what?! In any case, Goergyboy de Militant was quick to fine MGRHA for his actions and also pardoned the troopleaders involved, many of whom did not know any better. In a valuable piece of advice by Sera on the matter, all new troopleaders have also been advised to never listen to a word MGRHA says ever again.
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| Moira Na Leodaich Killed in Rollsovar! | |
Yesterday, the start of the new Tilogian Hunting season was marked in spectacular fashion by the death of Moira Na Leodaich, the Chancellor of Outer Tilog. In what has become a ritualistic tradition for the Tilogian people, Moira accompanied her troops in one of their classic assaults on Rollsovar. You know, the assaults with hopelessly outnumbered and splintered forces? Of course the result of the battle yesterday was no different to the result the last time they attacked Rollsovar. And the time before that, and the time before that..in fact I better stop now. The defeats of Outer Tilog would probably cover several issues. How exactly Moira was cut down in this latest battle is still largely a mystery. Some claim she was crushed underneath the rabble of Tilogians who tried to scale the Palisades, others say Archers on the walls picked her out as prime target due to the strong sense of decay coming from her direction. Personally I'm more fond of the story that as soon as Moira made it over the palisades, she received a crossbow bolt in the eye. Seconds before a javelin also found it's final resting place within Moira's broken body. Of course Moira is not the first Tilogian Council member to fall in a failed assault on Rollsovar. Despyria Eiryn, the Supreme Judge of Outer Tilog was also killed in a particularly suicidal assault on Rollsovar not so long ago. Despyria arrived alone to take on the full force of the Rollsovan militia. I hear that the mockery of a battle that followed was one of the best sessions of target practice the Rollsovan Archers had ever had! The full extent of what this latest death will do to the already fragile Giblot-Outer Tilog relations is not yet known. It has been revealed however, that Valast Hendrix, King of Lukon, had been secretly courting Moira before her death. Some have even whispered that he proposed to her just hours before she died in the unprovoked assault on Rollsovar. Being the cheerful paper we are we'd just like to send our condolences to Valast for the loss of his latest lover. The man has clearly had a rough time since we cast his last lover, Thanatos Reaver, out of Giblot and chased him from the continent. |
