Itorunt Informer/December '06

1st round... god that hurts...
The Itorunt Informer
Free, although we like it when you throw money. Written by Valdid Juramona, and San Exiled, and Thray Walsh pretends to work here but doesn't really. Ichigo Kurosaki considered leaving, then decided he was too awesome.	Bringing you the best of the press from Itorunt, but missing our past editors.	November Edition

News Winter events We apologise for the lack of news recently, but there's simply been nothing to write about... with no war, no uprisings, no obvious shady dealing, we figured it would be a bit boring to post reports saying "nothing's happening". The good news: Something has happened! The bad news: it's another tournament. Lycastus, Pontifex of Light of Fountain and Duke of Fontan City, announced a tournament of jousting and swordfighting to be held on December the 25th with a first place prize of 1000 gold, and a runners up prize of 200 gold for both events. Predicted to have a huge turnout, the fighting should be tough. Upon arrival, we will keep you informed of what (if anything) happens at the tournament grounds. --San Rebellion in Old Rancagua... Today a rebellion was declared by Rhargec in Old Rancagua. Although we have been awaiting a response by King Dekion, such has not been forthcoming, so we publish the speech given by the rebel leader himself. Old Rancagua, Knights, Dammes, Lords, Ladies and Nobles of this once wonderful realm, The day has come to finally give an end to the current misery of our realm. The day has come to get rid of all those that dragged us in a senseless war without a purpose. To get rid of all those that sacrificed our soldiers in vain, in a war that was made for the interest of the few. I have seen with my own eyes many worthy nobles leaving old rancagua in disgust. I have seen others banned or disgraced like High Guard, one of the few Nobles here that think correctly. And for what? To win a very very easy war. A war that the General insists (after all this time) that we are winning and we would have lost if wasn’t for Sirion and Fontan to help us clean the mess we created! We thought that we would crash a small realm without problems and then share the spoils of the war. But no. We get crashed by the small island! Again and again! And every time the General says his favourite lie. That we are closer to victory! We were closer to defeat until Sirion and Fontan came to help us lick our wounds. Everyone laughs at us. We turned ourselves from a glorious realm to a beggar of other’s help. What will the history books write for the kingdom of Old Rancagua ? I’ll tell you what. That the only thing we did was to defeat of one very small realm and that because Sirion and Fontan send their armies.That we are stupid and worthless. Dekion lost his credibility. I used to trust him. My grandfather had told me that he was one of the best men he had ever met. It wasn’t true. Dekion is just another power hungry dog of war, full of promises and nothing of results! What to say about Johnny? The worst General my family has ever seen. He even became the reason for so many to leave or even to join our enemy. He is so worthless that even my 17 year old students can be better generals than him! I will prove that when I appoint a 17 year old student I have! It’s ridiculous! HE is ridiculous. Johnny is licking the butts of Sirion and Fontan’s generals only to hide his rotten mind and stupidity! And he thinks that we are so stupid as he is, for not understanding how stupid he is! The rest of the council? The judge tortures enemies, and he was put in place only to support the war efforts! Has anyone from the council even thought the chances for peace? Even the former King of Old Rancagua, Fuinur, and his followers have left in disgust. You insulted Prometheus because he was looking for peace. First you praised him, saying that you will fight for his lost realm and then you say he is a traitor! Fools! What about the Dukes and Counts. They neglect their region they even leave for long term vacation and then they return to be reappointed, no questions ever asked. They are faithful to Dekion and that’s enough. Is this how much they love these holy grounds, for which so much blood was shed? No my realm mates. The council has failed us. It is time to put them aside and give space to new ambitious and skilled Ladies that are looking for peace. It is time to allow the gentle Ladies of this realm to take the control of the council and arrange the things on their own way. A way so different than the one we, men, were used to. A way much smarter than what our council is following! Although my grandfather, Charger the Great, writes in his manuscripts I have recently found, that no mercy should be given to all those that betrayed him and the realm once, I have decided to spare you if Dekion and the members of the Council step down immediately. I don’t care how many times you have insulted his name with countless lies and mud sling, I won’t follow his example. Join us in the new age of peace, or disappear completely forgotten from history. If what we, the revolutionaries, ask isn’t done within the next day, all those that won’t join the rebellion will be banned, and the treacherous war mongers that will join the loyalists and the current failed council will be hunted down and executed without mercy, the same way that my father and his followers were executed long ago. And may milady Tatjana, heart and brain of the revolution forgive me, Rhargec grandson of Charger the Great, the only man who ever rebelled successfully in the east continent, for this decision I took on my own! We tried the sword, let’s try the rose While this reporter has little knowledge of what is happeneing, we did hear reports of a significant victory being won in Ashforth by the rebels over the loyalists. We will keep you updated. --San Lies from Avamar already? It seems Avamar has decided that what the heck, no realm on this continent should be spared from libel. While the editor of this paper frankly doesn't give a hoot about Northern affairs, there are some downright lies that are insulting to the Empire of Itorunt. As follows: The Northern Alliance has already conquered the northern half of the Continent and keeps expanding, while the Southern Alliance still struggles to dominate in the southern half with their only obstacle being the once mighty Kingdom of Perdan. The Southern Alliance (semantically the Southern Federation, or SF) made peace with Perdan months ago, Itorunt first among them. That the editors of the Avamar times then see fit to publish as news that Perdan is a "barrier" to the expansion of the southern federation is laughable. Especially considering that an alliance was offered between the realms of Perdan and Itorunt. Barrier, my posterior. A reasonable question from all these would be: where is the Middle in all these? Similarly, I could ask - where is the western alliance? Or the eastern alliance? Or how about a plonked all across the continent alliance? The fact is that diplomacy is decided by the diplomats, this explains the alliances - calling it due to geographical location is folly. When will the sleeping Beauty finally awake from her stupor? And when will Avamar 1. get their facts right and 2. stop bugging everyone? --San New Guild A guild for all newspaper writers has been created in Itor Boss by the gracious Lady Valdid, sponsored by the founders of the II. This guild, the Interrealm Guild of News, is for all newspaper editors of the continent (or so I believe). However, you'll have to make your way to Itor Boss, as the only guildhouse is located there. This will make for easy transfer of news across the continent. --Ichigo I'm back As it says, I decided I was too awesome to leave. ...Actually, the family emergency was resolved, and our family was able to stay. In other realm news, we're still working out our possible religion. Also, some more relevant news is to come. --Ichigo New month, off with a bang Several new pieces of news. Firstly, our army system has been a success as far as I can see - the army of Semall has been successfully integrated and I have been made marshal by the grace of Duke Robert. Also, Sir Emanuel, the Count of Zawr, announced that he has the intention to be founding Itorunt's first religious when he has gathered enough funds for the task. This is good news following concerns that Itorunt's nobles were mostly indifferent to religion. I myself have this explained by my path in the Guardians of Twilight religion, but many others have no calling whatsoever. We will keep you updated on how things turn out. --San

Comments for this month Ichigo's comments It's true, you know. I am too awesome to leave. Goodbye, San. Maybe now I have a chance of winning a tournament. Thray's comments None Yet (and likely to stay that way, since he's lazy) Valdid's comments None Yet San's comments We'll miss Ichigo here at the II. We wish him much happiness and lots of pie in future. Yay, I'm Marshal!