Far East Times

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The Far East Times
Gossip, propaganda and occasionally news from the Far East.

Disclaimer: This paper is not affiliated to any realm, religion or faction. Our only goal is to print whatever gets people reading. As a result all articles should be read as being for entertainment purposes only and not as a true representation of events even if they are. Reliable and trustworthy Biased and lazy we pledge to bring you only the finest gossip, propaganda and half cocked reporting of events we can muster!
Editor: Sir William "the Wordy" Wordsworth

Articles, rumours and propaganda
In Brief

EXCLUSIVE: Details of the surrender of Ohnar West - 18 September 2013

This week Ohnar West (last seen looking for the missing Ohnar East) surrendered to the forces of the Arcaean Empire. However, the Far East Times is proud to go beyond reporting this common knowledge and bring you details of the peace negotiations and the uproar it has caused in the heart of the empire.

Under the terms of the peace treaty the previous peace treaty between Sorraine and Ohnar West has been dissolved, ending the unfavourable terms to the Sorrainians and seeing the return of much Sorrainian land. To the north, Coralynth, another Sartanian realm, will gain Nbasah back from the Ohnarians as well as being given Unotosa and Athios from Arcaea in order to bribe them to stop fighting.

In Arcaea these terms have caused much dispute with many nobles demanding the war be continued until Ohnar West has been wiped from the map completely. As it is, Ohnar West may simply have to change its name and ban certain noble families as well as joining the empire - no doubt to the disgust of many Sartanians who might have hoped for the chance to create another Sartanian realm.

And, in fact, one anonymous Arcaean noble took against the peace terms so much that he went on a bloody killing spree in Ohnarian territory just after the peace treaty was announced in the hope of restarting the war. Though this has brought the promised wrath of Emperor/Tyrant Velax of Arcaea if he ever catches the noble responsible, it is undoubtedly a sign of the kind of ruthless disregard for decency or diplomatic agreements which will almost certainly one day result in the unnamed noble becoming a great statesman if he or she survives long enough.


Where are THEY hiding??? - 4 September 2013

With the Southern Alliance in disarray and the Imperial Forces regaining lost land, the major forces of the continental confilct remain well hidden behind their walls. There is smoke in the air and that surely is not from an upcoming battle. Fleeing is the most obvious reason after the significant reduce of manpower observed for Kindara, Cathay and Arcaea.

Without much of interest for expansion in the North, as Ohnar West and Sorraine have not been involved in any major battle for quite some time now, the War seems to have now been limited to minor confrontations between the already devastated realms in the middle of the continent; the Principality of Zonasa and Greater Aenilia.

Both realms have noted significant losses from getting dragged in a War brought to them by the super powers of the Far East and they are left alone in a struggle to preserve their sovereignty without being any more able to pose any real threat. The War has lasted for too long resulting in undesired stagnation.

What will happen to occupied lands? When will the hide and seek end?


Outrage as Emperor Velax supports peasants overthrowing nobility! - 28 August 2013

In a development that has caused outrage, Emperor/Tyrant Velax of Arcaea has sent a letter to his nobles celebrating the peasant revolts that have overthrown noble rule in Hutael and Paplarmi!

In the letter, the man who rules the north with an iron fist described the situation as "Good news" and "Very nice work, indeed".

While the anarchy the regions have fallen into will no doubt harm the Kindaran war effort, it is very worrying news indeed if the most powerful man in the Far East has decided to endorse peasants overthrowing the gods ordained rule of noblemen and women.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? Is Velax right to support filthy peasants overthrowing everything that is good and proper in the world? Write in to the Times to vote YES or NO in our exclusive poll!


News from the 'Old Tavern': The Battle of Twenty One Peasants - 28 August 2013

Yesterday the Sorraine army tried to ambush the Ohnar forces in the region of Pesol. The Ohnarian army was divided between the two regions, moving slowly in this rogue lands. The Sartanian forces army tried to destroy them separately with a fast attack. This well planed tactic ended in disaster because 21 peasants decided to attack both armies the same day! This suicidal attack destroyed Sorrainian surprise and gave the Ohnarians enough time to assemble the rest of their army in the region.

Today the, now complete, Ohnar army has attacked Sorraine forces. After suffering a heavy shower of arrows, the Ohnarian units charged the Sartanian line, a hard melee ensued, but the discipline of the Sartanian units prevailed and the Ohnarian army has been totally defeated.

Many times in this war, Ohnar sources have boasted about their military efficiency and the lack of it by their Sartanian foes... but with this battle, this claimed military superiority has been proved false.

The Old Tavern is a new guild dedicated to providing news and information throughout the Far East. The Times welcomes this new competition as it will allow us to steal their news and present it to our readers without having to do as much work ourselves. Thanks Old Tavern! - The Editor


Arcaean lords have 'food fight' while peasants starve! - 20 August 2013

Baron Reginald von Borghoff II of Apasur has started publicly fighting with Imperial Chancellor (banker) of Arcaea Josef von Genf who was formerly the Chancellor (ruler) of Ohnar West - oh how titles have become devalued since then - over something as trivial as food!

Baron Reginald has called the Imperial Chancellor "small and petty" for apparently publicly "naming and shaming" lords who have not given the Imperial Chancellor's lackeys access to their granaries. In a letter sent to the whole realm the Baron raged:

"Giving you access to The food storage is the local Lord's choice... I have served this land long and well. and I have been in a Realm where the lands were betrayed by one person in power (Old Grehk before the split into old and New). I govern my lands well and as IS MY RIGHT, I choose to continue to do so in the same way as I have."

However, Joseph von Genf blasted back with a lengthy reply in which he implied that Baron Reginald was a simple minded fool who doesn't read letters, saying "I did not in fact made anything into a public issue. I sent a letter to you, a fellow Lord, and your respective lieges as well as concerned officers of the crown. You are the one who decided to reply publicly."

And tempers clearly haven't calmed as Imperial Magistrate Lendin Bendix then joined in the fight in favour of the Imperial Chancellor while Ambassador Sir Richard Telrunya of Nocaneb sided in defence of Baron Reginald's letter. Clearly this dispute will rage on for long to come.

Meanwhile in Tapaliez, whose lack of food apparently triggered the argument about who controls food supplies, hundreds of peasants have died from starvation.

Our editor has said it before and will say it again: feudalism just don't work.


Historic Arcaean artifact recovered! - 16 August 2013

An historic sword, the Bone Sabre of Blood, the former possession of Emperor/Tyrant Velax de Vere of Arcaea and lost by him in a duel with Harbinger Cyrus of Greater "but currently without even a single city" Aenilia, has resurfaced in the hands of Lady Sythia Lanze of Sasat.

Not only did the sword once belong to Velax de Vere but it was also gifted to him by Lord Lokenth Daycryn on behalf of the legendary, and now occasionally mentally incapacitated, King Jenred Bedwyr of Arcaea.

Commenting on the discovery, Imperial Magistrate Lendin Bendix of Arcaea stated "I was wondering where it got off to. We were wholly disappointed when Cyrus was captured and didn't have it on him."

According to our sources the sword is in a tarnished and battered state but is being rushed to Velax's tame adventurer (how are these creatures tamed? We hear it involves a combination of mead and a morning star....) as quickly as possible for repair. No doubt it will soon be restored to Velax's collection of shiny things he likes to wear on the battlefield.


The Far Eastern Times is launched! - 16 August 2013

Huzzah! Today your the Times has launched - the new newspaper for the Far East! Reliable and trustworthy Biased and lazy we pledge to bring you only the finest gossip, propaganda and half cocked reporting of events we can muster!

But what makes this even better is that anyone, yes anyone, even you you boar eating, peasant murdering, illiterate knight of a dirt poor rural region best known for the fornication of locals with sheep, can write articles for us! Simply write your piece of propaganda or opinion and we'll publish it, no questions asked!

Welcome to the future of Battlemasterran newspapers where our motto is always "Standards? What are they?"

16 August 2013 -

Damn that's gotta hurt: The realms of Kindara and Greater Aenilia were soundly defeated by the Principality of Zonasa in Palnasos despite outnumbering the Zonasans two to one.