Volcanic Hot Newsletter/December '06 issue
 Volcanic Hot Newsletter
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| Price: 1 gold | Creator: Crescent | December '06 issue |
Contents
Comments from Darkans |
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Paradigm, Priest of Darkanism, said: "RedSpan, worshipers of goats... No human should worship a lesser being. May Sigrid release her flames upon these goat worshipers. Although... these goat worshipers are even unbefitting even for Sigrid and therefore should be thrown in the Holy Volcano so their unworthy remains cannot disturb the souls in the present and afterlife."
Yeti, Count of Wistir, said: "I find it most interesting to read the intercepted messages that Lady Lavigna sent to the rest of the realm. RedSpan seems to be a mindless place where beasts rule, much like our own Vatticus personal psyche. They constantly wave their arms in the air and beckon us to come. Then turn around and make sure their 'friends' in the area support them. Truly this is not the conduct of a brave and mighty people, but that of a small child looking to an older sibling for help. Now where is Da Goat with Da Milk for Da Kids? Da?"
Obidan, Knight of Tolhuar said on the RS war: "I think it's a trap by RS and SA to trap us on Darka's tongue and wipe it a bit clean. They surely did act in a way to...well...excite or tempt us to go to their lands, so this might very well be a conspiracy by escalating a matter to a higher level so that Darka falls."
Juan, Knight of Mayxcal, said: "As a human being trying to survive in this violent land, I feel sorry for our Redspan brethren. Nothing is more disheartening than coming home to an ugly woman. While I have never seen an unattractive female in Darka, I can only imagine the horror and frustration RedSpanians feel every night and day. All men have needs that require relief, after all. I only pray that Redspan's Nobles give proper consideration to the Goats that provide them alternative service. Selfishness towards one's partner is a cruelty Billy G. does not deserve. A little extra corn and maybe some Vaseline can go a long way in a philotherian affair. ...and be nice to the wife at home too."
Lady Lavigna, Arch Priestess of Darka, Countess of Tolhuar, said: "I believe that the terrible smell of goats has affected their brains and has transformed them in non-thinking humans, which subsequently led to their poor attempts at propaganda. They assassinated our Banker and led themselves in this war for which they begged our King to reconsider, and now they pretend to be the macho heroes that challenge us to go and fight them? Silly goats, they found as allies the sheep of their Federation and think they can be in front of our mighty army." |
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