Muninn Newsrag/January 2011

MUNINN NEWSRAG
Lead Editor: Davendrall (User:X-anne-x) Editor, Agony Aunt and Official Spell-checker: Anneliese (User:Audacity)	Cost: 3 cookies	January 2011

January's Paper

Ask Anne the Agony Aunt
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• Anneliese is in the Far East and therefore cannot answer any questions right now.
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Tournament in Leohampton		Saturday 8th January
This morning, 60 nobles from 11 realms joined together in friendly fighting in hope to gain honour, glory, and perhaps the large amount of gold offered for first and second prize. The tournament in Minis Ithil took place in two parts, firstly, a test of the knights sword-fighting ability, secondly, a test of the knights skill with a lance in a jousting contest. There were 6 rounds of sword-fighting, reducing the contestants to the two most skilled sword fighters there; Mackenzie from Darka and Ain from Caergoth. Though Ain fought well, Mackenzie was overall the strongest, and took the prize of 1000 gold, Ain receiving 300 for second place. For the jousting contest, again 6 rounds were held, until Eoin from Carelia and Dren Septre from Barony of Makar found themselves facing each other, lances pointing, horses ready, in the final. Three bouts took place, the first taken by Eoin, the second by Dren, leaving it all down to the last one. The pair seemed evenly matched, however, showing great horsemanship and expert lance skills, Eoin smashed Drens shield, knocking him off his horse, joining Mackenzie in receiving 1000 gold prize money.
Editor: Davendrall

Davendrall angry at Anneliese being deported to the Far East		Monday 3rd January
Thanks to several (censored by scribe) realms declaring war on Eston for absolutely no reason at all, for certain nobles wishing to leave Eston, it is necessary to travel through enemy territory, which of course ended up in the capture of Anneliese in the Cagilan Empire. And thanks to some (censored by scribe) judge banning Anneliese for petty crimes, she became rogue, while in enemy prisons. But we thought, it will be okay, she hasn't committed any crime towards the empire, so why would they punish her? After all, they captured a lowly saboteur, promising to release her within 3 days of capture. But no! Some (censored) Judge, who clearly isn't sane, or has any form of intelligence, deports her! For no reason! So now a journey that would have taken about a week, will take over 3 weeks! And poor Davendrall has to try and survive on her own. But hey, look on the bright side, when Anneliese and Davendrall finally join Carelia, they will kicking the (censored) out of the Cagilan Empire.
Editor: Davendrall

Anneliese deported to the Far East		Monday 3rd January
After returning from the Taran Prison, Editor Davendrall Felhand received this letter: Lady Davendrall, Anneliese and I have been separated in the Cagilan Empire. She was caught by patrols while traveling, and taken into prison. I was several paces behind her, so I was able to hide before they saw me. While she was inside, the ban spoken on her took effect. I don't know why, but the judge then decided to deport her to some place called the 'Far East'. Perhaps it is standard practice to deport rogue nobles? I heard this while traveling through the rest of Cagilan lands. Apparently, she caused quite a ruckus when they forced her on the ship, screaming a man's name (which I knew must have been you, as she is fond of shortening your name to 'Dave') and hurling insults. They had to hit her on the head to get her on the ship. I thought you would want to know. Also, please don't hurt me, I had nothing to do with this. Signed, Anneliese's squire, Jessie
Editor: Davendrall

Happy new year from a Taran prison		Sunday 2nd January
Happy new year my dear Newsrag readers! What a joyous way for me to spend new years? In a (censored by scribe) Taran prison cell And why have I been imprisoned you may ask? Why? Well, I will tell you why. FOR TRAVELING THROUGH THEIR LANDS! Doing no damage at all, having no troops, merely, traveling. I didn't even burn any warehouses down! The fact I was planning to in the next region was an entirely different matter! It's not my fault half the continent decided to declare war on Eston for no reason! I mean, the cheek of it! Arresting me, the great Davendrall Felhand, for traveling through their land?! Its preposterous! It's a scandal! Their land is below me anyway. I mean, well of course it is, if I'm standing on it, but the land should be honoured to have me walking on it's pathetic burnt out upper layer! Arrested? So rude! And to show further the Tarans bad manners, the Taran Judge hasn't even bothered to reply to a letter I sent. And has left me in a cell to rot! These Tarans need to kidnapped, beaten, tortured, and given some lessons in etiquette!
Editor: Davendrall

Anneliese banned from Eston		Saturday 1st January
A judge of Eston, Athena Leather, has 'politely asked' Anneliese to leave the realm of Eston for a 'continual disregard for Eston laws' after once again issuing a duel during war time. It was announced that if Anneliese hadn't left the realm within 3 days she would be banned. As such I have come to the conclusion, this is just a polite and prolonged way of banning someone, as getting to another realms capital within 3 days is a little unlikely, especially if you want to be picky about which realm you wish to join The duel challenge was issued to a young darken noble whom previously kissed Davendrall, bringing great insult upon the Dames. But as the dishonorable coward that he is, for the second time, he has refused to accept the duel. Davendrall and Anneliese were interviewed by a reporter earlier today: Davendrall: "Well we didn't like Eston anyway! And we're going to leave anyway. And you know why? Because they all smell funny!" Anneliese: "I thought she was getting a bit soft, what with all those trouble-makers doing evil things like sending peasant heads to Smeagenwulf." Davendrall: "Or sending a box of inappropriate toys to various nobles, including the General, or torturing and killing several people, or kidnapping a general, dressing him up as a women, and entering him in a beauty contest." Annelise: "Those trouble makers should be banned." Davendrall: "Such despicable behavior, who would do such things?!"
Editor: Davendrall