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| − | '''Roleplay from Kisharianda Onyxien'''
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| − | Walking towards Cenarious' study she could hear the conversation between the two clearly, trying to divert her attention elsewhere she couldn't help but pay attention to the way Sorsha spoke to the King.
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| − | Her voice was direct and even behind a half closed door she couldn't make any softness in her voice, she had become a warrior hidden inside an armor speaking only what she thought with very little care of other’s reactions. A good quality to have for a SIC, her duties came first. She listened closely to get a feel of her spoken words, and the softness she once knew from Sorsha was gone.
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| − | Upon hearing the last words from Sorsha to Cenarious she straitened herself, gave a small knock and entered the room.
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| − | "Dame Sorsha it is nice to see you I hear everything went well in Ordenstaat" she looked over at Cenarious and handed him an opened letter she had just received. Cenarious looked at the seal and bowed his head to Kish.
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| − | "You ladies catch up, I have some matters to tend to" he leaned over and kissed his wife, smiled and bowed his head at Sorsha on his way out.
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| − | "I’m glad I caught you before you left, I know you have been going through some hard times with the loss of your cousin Kaylan, and with Duke Conrac leaving D'Hara" she almost hesitated to continue when she notice the cold stare from Sorsha "If there's anything I can do to help ease your sorrows my door is always opened to you, you know that right?" Sorsha stared back in silence filling the room with awkwardness.
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| − | Swallowing she clasped her hands together "The reason I mention it, is because my sister Aewyn has just recently informed me that our step sister Fiona has not yet been made aware of her sister's fate, and I feel that we somehow share a big loss with Kaylan gone" she looked at Sorsha and waited for a reply and Sorsha licked her lips as if to begin speaking.
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| − | '''Roleplay from Sorsha McDowell'''
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| − | Sorsha bowed as the King withdrew and turned her attention to the Duchess. It no longer surprised her now. Every time she was in the company of someone she had cared for, she withdrew completely. Kisharianda’s questions only managed to numb her further.
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| − | The relation between them was confusing, Kisharianda’s step sister, Fiona was in fact, a McDowell. Kaylan’s real sister, hence Fiona was her proper cousin. She should have cared that Kaylan’s fate had not reached her, but instead she regarded her coolly, the deep rooted anger controlled within the iron grip of emptiness.
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| − | “Kaylan was the best of us all,” she answered instead. “As for Conrac…,” her voice was flat after saying his name, “I could care less where he is now, he is no one to me.”
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| − | She crossed her arms, and a brow rose. “Your offer is noted, but sorrow no longer touches me,” she told her indifferently and watched the Queen’s hands.
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| − | “Are you well?” She didn’t ask out of concern, but more curiosity.
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| − | '''Roleplay from Kisharianda Onyxien'''
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| − | She watched and listened as Sorsha basically brushed off the pain of her cousin's death easily, not even a small sign of sorrow in her eyes. Either she had gotten really good at hiding her emotions or she just didn't feel anything anymore. Not something unnatural for someone who had gone through so much in such little time. But right now in her own selfish manner she was happy that Bowie had pointed out Sorsha as being the other woman, and she was somewhat excited to see that she hadn't even gotten a reaction from her. <i>Someone indifferent to their emotions, maybe Master Ugyel could shed some light on my new findings.</i>
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| − | "Yes I am fine, I may be a little restless with the pregnancy I get a little shaky sometimes" she smiled and rubbed her hands together bringing them to her mouth as if to be saying a prayer.
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| − | "I have a question to ask you Dame Sorsha, you do not have to answer me if you do not wish" she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly "What has happened to you? I do not get the same feelings from you as I did before, I fear that you have become silent and it's eating at you slowly" she watched Sorsha as she continued "I remember your smile so clearly the day you returned to your old self after the events that took place, but somewhere in between now and then something in you has grown cold, forgive my forwardness but I do not hold back when I speak to those I care about" she waited for Sorsha to respond
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| − | Deep down she wanted Sorsha to remain as emotionless as she had been, that would mean she could possibly be this <i>other</i> woman. And if in deed it was her she would not be able to hold on much longer since she had heard of a possible movement back to Ordenstaat. Irregardless she would have to inform Master Ugyel and have him place the books in her hands to see what she reveals on her own. This was a delicate matter and she knew that she couldn't just place all her hopes just on Sorsha with a possibility that she might be the one to lead her to the Scholar. But silently she hoped it was her, it would make it much easier to be at the side of someone she already knew.
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| − | '''Roleplay from Sorsha McDowell'''
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| − | Sorsha examined every one of Kisharianda’s movements with calculation. She knew the Duchess was doing the same in return. “No need to apologize. You of all people should know how direct I am, why should you be any different?”
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| − | Sorsha uncrossed her arms and began to walk, Kisharianda followed. She knew the layout of the Palace, and they walked in silence for some time until they reached the balcony looking over the city. The small breeze hit them both and she leaned over the side, her gaze unconsciously in the direction of the stars. Kisharianda could feel Sorsha had not declined, and waited patiently for her to speak.
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| − | “What happened to me…” she repeated barely above a whisper, not really knowing the answer herself. “Seems to be the only question I hear of late, what if I don’t have an answer to give you?” Sorsha then looked at her, examining her face. The love that shone through the Queen’s features, Sorsha could not ignore. If she wanted to, she could use that love and hurt her so easily, and in the end she would be completely indifferent to her actions. She had done so before with Lycan, Mathias, Rathan… In Kisharianda she could see who she used to be.
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| − | “Tell me…What would happen if the world you knew crumbled at your feet? The people you love and adore disappeared without telling you why, no explanations? And the ones who promised to carry you, rejected you at every turn and let you fall?” She could see Kisharianda waiting for her to show the emotions to carry her words but they were no longer within her. All there was in her eyes was an eerie emptiness.
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| − | “I know what you will answer, pain…” she said dully. “I remember the word well, but for some reason, I just can’t remember what it feels like…” her eyes bore into Kish’s. “I can’t remember what anything feels like,” she whispered. “There is a void inside me, it consumes everything and there is nothing left. Whatever lesson I was made to learn, I learned it well. Whatever person I was, or I thought I was, has died and I cannot find life again.” She did not know why she had said anything to her in the first place, maybe she tired of the question altogether. Perhaps now they would leave her in peace.
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| − | “Satisfied?”
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| − | '''Roleplay from Kisharianda Onyxien '''
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| − | Listening to Sorsha tell her how or what she thought she felt made her understand a little more about who Sorsha really was deep down inside. It wasn't so much that Sorsha had changed it was that she was molding herself in the person she was meant to be. Now for others that response would have led them to believe that she was just hurt and putting up a wall but the reality was that she was growing, maturing becoming wise to her surroundings. This was exactly what she needed to see in Sorsha, and this could quite possibly be the person Ugyel spoke of.
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| − | Kish listened and nodded, understanding what Sorsha was actually trying to tell her. "You are strong Sorsha and I admire that about you, All that matters is that you are content with who you are" she looked at Sorsha "Yes I would have to say I'm satisfied with that answer" she leaned back on the balcony looking at Sorsha, she was truly satisfied with her answer it gave her the opportunity to see if Sorsha was in fact being truthful with her own emotions and she was. Not one time when she answered her did she feel any sorrow, pain, or sadness she felt nothing, and that was exactly what she was hoping to get from her, no emotions.
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| − | Looking up she could see clouds forming in the sky, it would be morning soon and it looked like it was going to bring in some rain. Luckily she could still get a few hours rest before the morning came.
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| − | "If you would like to stay the remainder of the night, I can have a room readied for you" she offered
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| − | "But I'm afraid I am going to have to get me some well deserved sleep the last couple days have been exhausting for me, and not to mention I feel like I'm getting heavier by the minute" she cupped her stomach in both hands rubbing in circular motions "The King will not be pleased to hear I'm not getting my rest, and If Marlene sees me I'm liable to get scolded like a child" she laughed
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| − | "What do you think will you spend what's left of the night?" she smiled and waited
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| − | '''Roleplay from Sorsha McDowell'''
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| − | Sorsha did not smile, and stood straighter. “If I am content with who I am? I cannot truly answer that,” she informed her. “Your offer is tempting, but I have some traveling to do, and some matters to take care of.” She began to walk away and looked over her shoulder, “you are the first to simply let it go. I don’t know what it means, but should you need anything, ask.”
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