IRC/Quotes
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Quotes from #battlemaster @ quakenet
January 2009
January 01
[19:15] <+Sacha> Used during Medieval Times, the Pear of Anguish was an extremely painful device used to punish homosexuals, witches and women accused of inducing a miscarriage. The Pear of Anguish had the shape of a pear; As a handle was turned, the spoon-shaped lobes opened; increasing pain. Even though the Pear of Anguish was mostly used for oral punishments, homosexuals had it fixed in their anus and women in their vagina. Causing severe pain, after this torture was employed on the mouth; the victim's teeth would get destroyed; making blood pour out of the victim's mouth often causing death. If introduced in the anus or vagina, death was a step away. The Pear of Anguish was rarely washed, thus causing infections very frequently. If the victim didn't die by an infection however, he would die by other diseases caused by the severe damage of his or her intestines. [19:16] <Thalathafn> ouch [19:16] <Thalathafn> they should really wash it [19:17] <+Sacha> to make the torture more humane? :p [19:17] <Thalathafn> especially if they are using it for both ends [19:17] <+Sacha> im guessing that if theres an expanding pear up your ass, cleanliness is the least of your concern
December 2008
December 25
[02:42] <Bedwyr> May Santa Vogt bring you all the best features tonight, so we may enjoy them all on the morrow [02:42] * Bedwyr whooshes off to harass a dev-reindeer
December 22
ELV and Sacha's collaborated topic: Rated: XXX...and working on that fourth X!
December 20
14:33:13 * Stabbity slaps _Tom__ around a bit with a large trout 14:33:13 * Sacha humps Tom 14:33:24 * Sacha high fives Stabbity 14:33:27 * Stabbity high fives sacha 14:33:29 <Sacha> lol 14:33:34 <Stabbity> :P 14:33:45 <Sacha> that couldnt have gone any better
December 18
[10:18] <ELV> Keplerstan must be poor veritek [10:18] <ELV> :P [10:18] |<-- Wimpie has left irc.quakenet.org (Quit: ChatZilla 0.9.84 [Firefox 3.0.4/2008102920]) [10:19] <ELV> nvm, its population is exorbitantly high [10:19] <Veritek> :p [10:19] <Veritek> Who needs more than two regions, when you stack the peasants like cordwood? [10:20] <zmobiebob> Why do they always have to be stacked like cordwood? [10:20] <zmobiebob> Why not some other kind of wood? [10:21] <zmobiebob> You should really stack peasants like peasants. [10:21] <ELV> because cordwood is easily stacked? [10:21] <Veritek> Maybe we should stack cordwood like we stack peasants... [10:22] <ELV> lol [10:22] <ELV> how are the peasants productive if they are stacked? [10:22] <ELV> do they sh*t gold? [10:22] <Veritek> not my concern [10:22] <Veritek> if they're not productive, we set a few on fire [10:22] <Veritek> until the rest are productive [10:22] <Veritek> the rest is irrelevant details [10:23] <zmobiebob> That's a good point. Seems like a waste of warehouse space. [10:23] <zmobiebob> 1. Human combustion. [10:23] <zmobiebob> 2.??? [10:23] <zmobiebob> 3. PROFIT! [10:23] <Veritek> exactly [10:23] <Veritek> step 2 doesn't concern me [10:24] <Lorgan> hoorray for the Combustion-gnomes! [10:25] <ELV> lol [10:26] <ELV> so...are most of the peasants in one region [10:26] <ELV> or 250k+ in both? [10:26] <ELV> I'd prefer one region [10:26] <ELV> a peasant region and then an outlying noble region away from the dirty peasants [10:26] <Veritek> Yeah, mostly [10:26] <Veritek> Right [10:26] <Veritek> One region for the filthy peasants [10:26] <Veritek> a small one [10:27] <Veritek> and a big region for the nobles and their servants [10:27] <Lorgan> hm [10:27] <Veritek> With ast wooded acres [10:27] <Veritek> long, tropical coastlines [10:27] <Lorgan> we shouldn't stack them too high though [10:27] <Lorgan> so they don't cast shadow on our region [10:27] <Veritek> ad luxurious mansions [10:27] <Veritek> Stack them too high, and theymight fall over [10:27] <Veritek> ruining their productivity [10:27] <Lorgan> indeed [10:28] <Veritek> then we'd have to burn them [10:28] <Lorgan> and they might enter our region [10:28] <Lorgan> which is a big no-no [10:29] <Veritek> yep [10:29] <Veritek> filthy peasants [10:29] <Lorgan> indeed [10:29] <Lorgan> they may only come into our regions to clean it [10:30] <Lorgan> untill they find a way to produce robots
December 15
[23:47] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Bah...I don't suppose you have any scouts of Papanian territory, do you Ethan? [23:47] <Jenred_Bedwyr> General Vulpes has been...Less than helpful. [23:47] <ELV> which ones? [23:48] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Anything that might tell us how much mobile CS they have? [23:48] <ELV> hhmm...depends...I could ask for one real quick [23:48] <ELV> got a guy in isular [23:48] * Jenred_Bedwyr will give you real solid US dollars if you give him a scout of Colasan, but thinks that this is too much to ask [23:48] <ELV> hehe [23:48] <Jenred_Bedwyr> I swear... [23:48] * ELV asks for colasan scout [23:48] <ELV> serious? [23:49] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Get me a scout in the next hour, and I'll send you money somehow. [23:49] * Jenred_Bedwyr has a checkbook [23:49] <ELV> gah...I hope he's on in the next hour [23:49] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Damn useless Papanian military... [23:49] <ELV> knowing you, you'd send me a penny [23:50] <ELV> you ARE a poor college kid :P [23:50] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Ah...I've actually got a fair bit of cash. [23:50] <Jenred_Bedwyr> I'd probably send five bucks for the scout [23:50] <ELV> w00t! [23:51] <ELV> is it sad when 5 dollars makes me happy? :P [23:51] * ELV thinks [23:51] <Jenred_Bedwyr> Is it sad when a scout of a region next to an ally's capital makes me happy enough to send five bucks? [23:51] <ELV> 50 top ramen! [23:51] <ELV> lol
October 2008
ELV, Sacha and Delvin's collaborated topic: Delvin Anaris: He's in our heads, infiltrating our thoughts, stealing our synapses, burning our brains! | I'm in ur headz, burnin' ur brainz - Lolcat Delvin
August 2008
August 19
<+Veritek> If they make a Tuchanon VI, will someone make a
Tuchanon EMACS and declare hatred of Tuchanon VI?
August 1
<ELV> I think its just celibate SachaD... <SachaD> meh <SachaD> you get the point :p <Uceek> ELV would know ;) ... <ELV> I only know because I know my english well is what I'm sure Kylie meant. ... <Uceek> exactly ELV
July 2008
Daviald's birthday poem written for Uceek:
[13:13:41] <Daviald> Some people see age as a badge of wisdom and fulfilled youth. Each passing year the mark increases and respect is deserved. [13:13:48] <Uceek> I hate it already [13:13:49] <Daviald> They pass out cake and give gifts in a celebration of life and joyful hope for many more years spent in your company, because each moment is a blessed gift of life from a higher power that is beyond our comprehension to understand. [13:13:53] <Uceek> :P [13:13:57] <Daviald> The truth is that it doesn’t matter how fast you run, how skilled you learn your karate moves, how many push-ups you can do or what diet plan you are on now. [13:14:03] <Daviald> An unpretentious and unrelenting fact remains. [13:14:11] <Daviald> That with each fleeting year the memories fade, friends vanish, beauty loses its color, life becomes a collection of memoirs. [13:14:19] <Daviald> As birthdays come and go all the alcohol and inebriated experiences in the world serve no embankment to the endless cycle of death. [13:14:21] <Daviald> Time marches on inexorably forward. [13:14:26] <Daviald> Unrelenting, unyielding, incompassionately it hears neither your pleas nor cares for your continued desire to live. It will envelop you in its embrace. [13:14:34] <Daviald> As you fold into his grip and enter the endless night you soon fade from memories and are you yourself forgotten. One more moment in the endless cycle of life and death. [13:14:35] <ELV> it's sad! [13:14:40] <ELV> what is wrong with you [13:14:42] <Daviald> . A dewdrop of water in the sea lost in the ebb and flow. A mere footstep in the surf. [13:14:50] <Riamh> Shut up, ELV...listen. No talk. [13:14:51] <Aarth> hehe [13:14:51] <Daviald> Life is a bitch, then you die. Enjoy what you can of it Kylie because you now have one less year. [13:14:59] <Uceek> Daviald!!
May 2008
Some exceptionally long bit of silliness involving lots of nick changes.
April 2008
[16:46] * Lavigna tried her Goddess-like voice [16:46] <Lavigna> who asked for me? [16:46] * Lavigna slaps Aarth around a bit with a large trout [16:46] <Aarth> Yes? [16:46] <Aarth> You are goddess? [16:47] <Lavigna> ya [16:47] <Aarth> Huh :P [16:47] <Lavigna> don't i look like one? [16:47] <Aarth> I havent seen a pic :P [16:47] <Lavigna> and you won't either [16:47] <Lavigna> you must have blind faith in me [16:47] <Aarth> Heh [16:47] <Lavigna> :) [16:47] <Aarth> :P [16:47] <Aarth> damnit. Dinner time. Mom shouting. [16:48] <Aarth> Brb.
February 2008
[01:15] <Uceek> I'm back [01:15] <Uceek> you all missed me, I can tell [01:15] <Uceek> its so quiet [01:15] <Annaej> lol [01:15] <Uceek> you're all depressed wondering when I'd be home from shopping [01:15] <Uceek> ;) [01:15] <Uceek> either that, or you didn't even notice I left :P [01:16] <Annaej> I think everyone either got drunk or went to bed, or both [01:16] <Uceek> lol [01:16] <SniperChief> I'm arguing with Reilwin about infinity [01:16] <Uceek> really? [01:16] <SniperChief> really really [01:16] <Uceek> so... afterall I don't think the orders changes are too bad [01:16] <Uceek> how about everyone else? [01:17] <Annaej> lol good Uceek [01:17] <SniperChief> (it's taking a while) [01:17] <Uceek> small realms it means nothing to [01:17] <Uceek> big realms, it kinda shares the workload [01:17] <Uceek> though, when 2ICs can send orders it will be better [01:17] <Reilwin> lol, Uceek : really really [01:18] <Uceek> really to infinity? :P [01:19] <Reilwin> to the infinity equal to that of the set which comprises all natural numbers, yup [01:19] * Reilwin refuses to continue till the infinity equal to the set which comprises all real numbers
January 2008
[14:44] <+VinnieThePooh> sting [14:44] <VinnieTheDark> uh [14:44] <VinnieTheDark> stop stealing my nickname [14:44] <Baraedor> VinnieThePooh ftw [14:44] <Baraedor> ! [14:44] Fi|in is now known as VinnieTheWood [14:45] Baraedor is now known as VinnieTheSquirr [14:45] <VinnieTheSquirr> damn [14:45] VinnieTheSquirr is now known as VinnieTheKoala [14:47] L sets mode: +o VinnieTheDark [14:47] <VinnieThePooh> oh-oh :) [14:48] VinnieTheDark sets mode: +ib #battlemaster!*@* [14:48] <VinnieTheDark> arrrgh [14:48] <VinnieTheWood> Arrrrrg [14:48] <VinnieTheKoala> Arrrrrg [14:49] VinnieTheDark sets mode: +b Vinnie*!*@* [14:49] <VinnieTheDark> ha [14:50] VinnieTheWood (~chatzilla@202.71.142.34) has left #battlemaster [14:50] V|nnieTheDark (~chatzilla@202.71.142.34) has joined #battlemaster [14:50] <VinnieThePooh> Someone care to translate what Vinnie is doing? I don't speak IRC :P [14:51] VinnieTheKoala (~Baraedor@client-86-27-164-89.popl.adsl.virgin.net) has left #battlemaster [14:51] Vinn1etheKoala (~Baraedor@client-86-27-164-89.popl.adsl.virgin.net) has joined #battlemaster [14:51] <Hoensbroeck> VinnieTheDark is trying to protect his nickname;) so that others can't use 'Vinnie-something' [14:51] VinnieThePooh is now known as PrincessVinnie [14:51] <PrincessVinnie> ? [14:51] <Vinn1etheKoala> ? [14:51] VinnieTheDark sets mode: -b+b Vinnie*!*@* *Vinnie*!*@* ... [11:16] <Ragnell> hi Peny [11:17] VinnieTheDark (~Vinnie@kotnet-147.kulnet.kuleuven.be) has joined #battlemaster [11:17] <VinnieTheDark> hm [11:17] <VinnieTheDark> was a little hard to join [11:17] <VinnieTheDark> with having my own nickname banned and all [11:18] <Esorp> Your nicjname was banned? ... [11:27] <Real-e-three> Vinnie banned his own nick :P [11:27] <Real-e-three> Hi Ragnell :) [11:27] <Real-e-three> Yesterday 3 of us changed our nicks to VinnieThe* [11:27] <Real-e-three> And so... [11:27] Real-e-three is now known as Peny [11:28] <Peny> Was fun :D [11:28] <Esorp> lol [11:28] Ragnell is now known as VinnieTheJerk [11:28] <Esorp> I saw someone called VinnieThePooh [11:29] <Peny> That's me :) [11:29] <Esorp> :D [11:29] <Peny> I do that when Vinnie is online :) [11:29] <Peny> Oh [11:29] Peny is now known as VinnieThePooh [11:29] <VinnieTheJerk> :-P [11:29] <VinnieThePooh> He's online :P [11:29] <Esorp> This is tempting.
[13:13] <Kai> moo [13:17] Peny pets the cow [13:20] m2rt milks the cow [13:24] m2rt is now known as Esorp [13:24] Esorp f*cks the cow [13:24] Esorp is now known as m2rt [13:24] Peny grabs a big butcher-knife [13:24] Peny is now known as Cow_Butcher [13:24] Cow_Butcher stabs [13:24] Cow_Butcher stabs again [13:24] Silverhawk starts the fire on a BBQ [13:25] Cow_Butcher is now known as Cow_ [13:25] Cow_ dies [13:25] m2rt brings the ketchup :P [13:25] Cow_ is BBQ-d [13:25] Cow_ is now known as Peny [13:25] Silverhawk grabs a plate and cuts of a piece for m2rt [13:26] m2rt takes the piece and thanks Silverhawk [13:26] <Peny> Milk, anyone? [13:26] m2rt enjoys the fine meat [13:27] <Peny> Kai-aw tastes good [13:43] <Peny> Aw, was someone here yesterday when Vinnie banned his own nick? [13:43] <Peny> I need a log of that :P
<Andrasta> :.:.:.:.:.: <Andrasta> you will never take the ramparts! <Andrasta> i fart in your general direction <Veritek> \_/------/|==|\ (catapult) <Veritek> O (big boulder) <Veritek> :.:... . . . ...:.:.: (what's left of your castle walls) <Ragnell> hmmm <Andrasta> damn you! Andrasta retreats to the keep Ragnell builds the stupid pillow wall again. <Andrasta> an ally! <Andrasta> now you are doomed, Veritek! <Andrasta> sally forth, brave warriors, and crush thine enemies! <Veritek> .| .| .| .| .| .| .| .| (my pikemen of DOOOM!) <Andrasta> 0|0|0|0|0|0| (shield wall!) <Veritek> ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ (my crows that will feast on your bodies!) <Veritek> >>>=====> (Ballista bolts to scatter your shield wall) <Andrasta> |) -> ^-^ (archers picking off the crows) <Ragnell> O-}-< (sleeping Raggy) <Andrasta> drats, my ally is defeated! <Veritek> <,,_,,)--- (Mice to scare your soldiers) <Andrasta> \o/ \o/ \o/ (surrendering troops) <Andrasta> |||||) (||||| (opened gates) <Veritek> o/ \o (victorious troops giving high 5s)
