Difference between revisions of "Volcanic Hot Newsletter/December '06 issue"
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title = Comments from Darkans| | title = Comments from Darkans| | ||
| − | article =<br> | + | article =<br> |
'''19 December''' | '''19 December''' | ||
''Paradigm, Priest of Darkanism, said:'' | ''Paradigm, Priest of Darkanism, said:'' | ||
| + | "RedSpan, worshipers of goats... No human should worship a lesser being. May Sigrid release her flames upon these goat worshipers. Although... these goat worshipers are even unbefitting even for Sigrid and therefore should be thrown in the Holy Volcano so their unworthy remains cannot disturb the souls in the present and afterlife." | ||
| − | |||
'''17 December''' | '''17 December''' | ||
''Yeti, Count of Wistir, said:'' | ''Yeti, Count of Wistir, said:'' | ||
| − | |||
"I find it most interesting to read the intercepted messages that Lady Lavigna sent to the rest of the realm. RedSpan seems to be a mindless place where beasts rule, much like our own Vatticus personal psyche. They constantly wave their arms in the air and beckon us to come. Then turn around and make sure their 'friends' in the area support them. Truly this is not the conduct of a brave and mighty people, but that of a small child looking to an older sibling for help. | "I find it most interesting to read the intercepted messages that Lady Lavigna sent to the rest of the realm. RedSpan seems to be a mindless place where beasts rule, much like our own Vatticus personal psyche. They constantly wave their arms in the air and beckon us to come. Then turn around and make sure their 'friends' in the area support them. Truly this is not the conduct of a brave and mighty people, but that of a small child looking to an older sibling for help. | ||
Now where is Da Goat with Da Milk for Da Kids? Da?" | Now where is Da Goat with Da Milk for Da Kids? Da?" | ||
| + | |||
'''16 December''' | '''16 December''' | ||
''Obidan, Knight of Tolhuar said on the RS war:'' | ''Obidan, Knight of Tolhuar said on the RS war:'' | ||
| − | |||
"I think it's a trap by RS and SA to trap us on Darka's tongue and wipe it a bit clean. They surely did act in a way to...well...excite or tempt us to go to their lands, so this might very well be a conspiracy by escalating a matter to a higher level so that Darka falls." | "I think it's a trap by RS and SA to trap us on Darka's tongue and wipe it a bit clean. They surely did act in a way to...well...excite or tempt us to go to their lands, so this might very well be a conspiracy by escalating a matter to a higher level so that Darka falls." | ||
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''Juan, Knight of Mayxcal, said:'' | ''Juan, Knight of Mayxcal, said:'' | ||
| − | |||
"As a human being trying to survive in this violent land, I feel sorry for our Redspan brethren. Nothing is more disheartening than coming home to an ugly woman. While I have never seen an unattractive female in Darka, I can only imagine the horror and frustration RedSpanians feel every night and day. All men have needs that require relief, after all. I only pray that Redspan's Nobles give proper consideration to the Goats that provide them alternative service. Selfishness towards one's partner is a cruelty Billy G. does not deserve. A little extra corn and maybe some Vaseline can go a long way in a philotherian affair. | "As a human being trying to survive in this violent land, I feel sorry for our Redspan brethren. Nothing is more disheartening than coming home to an ugly woman. While I have never seen an unattractive female in Darka, I can only imagine the horror and frustration RedSpanians feel every night and day. All men have needs that require relief, after all. I only pray that Redspan's Nobles give proper consideration to the Goats that provide them alternative service. Selfishness towards one's partner is a cruelty Billy G. does not deserve. A little extra corn and maybe some Vaseline can go a long way in a philotherian affair. | ||
...and be nice to the wife at home too." | ...and be nice to the wife at home too." | ||
| + | |||
'''14 December''' | '''14 December''' | ||
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}} | }} | ||
| − | + | {{Template:Darka_large_left| | |
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| − | {{Template: | ||
title = Amancair and Lisa Weds| | title = Amancair and Lisa Weds| | ||
| − | + | date = 18 December| | |
| − | + | article = As the crimson sun set upon the [[Darkanism/Temples#Temple_Locations|Holy Temple]] at Bisquez, there stood Lord Amancair, the Duke of [[Atamara/Bisquez|Bisquez]] and Lady Lisa awaiting for the commencement of the Matrimony; presiding was [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]] Darka's Guardian of [[Darkanism]]. Amancair attired in the finest apparel of royal blue. The lady emanated in a dark red gown against the picturesque sunset. | |
| − | |||
| − | As the crimson sun set upon the [[Darkanism/Temples#Temple_Locations|Holy Temple]] at Bisquez, there stood Lord Amancair, the Duke of [[Atamara/Bisquez|Bisquez]] and Lady Lisa awaiting for the commencement of the Matrimony; presiding was [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]] Darka's Guardian of [[Darkanism]]. Amancair attired in the finest apparel of royal blue. The lady emanated in a dark red gown against the picturesque sunset. | ||
The ceremony was conducted according to the customs of [[Darkanism/Ceremonies#Weddings|Darkanism Weddings]]. The sacrifices were made and the ashes transformed Amancair and Lisa's love into a single union of renewed love under the flames of [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] and ashes of [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Darka|Darka]]. | The ceremony was conducted according to the customs of [[Darkanism/Ceremonies#Weddings|Darkanism Weddings]]. The sacrifices were made and the ashes transformed Amancair and Lisa's love into a single union of renewed love under the flames of [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] and ashes of [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Darka|Darka]]. | ||
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| − | {{Template: | + | {{Template:Darka_large_left| |
title = Finegus Tortured!| | title = Finegus Tortured!| | ||
| − | + | date = 18 December| | |
| − | + | article = A day after [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]] attempted to take [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]]'s life, Lavigna paid a visit to his cell with her torturer, as promised. Here is an actual account of what happened. | |
| − | |||
| − | A day after [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]] attempted to take [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]]'s life, Lavigna paid a visit to his cell with her torturer, as promised. Here is an actual account of what happened. | ||
:After the all night celebrations in [[Atamara/Bisquez|Bisquez]] one of the Royal Guards approached Lavigna.She was sitting on a chair moving her feet to the sound of the music and singing...it was obvious that she had too much 7-up... | :After the all night celebrations in [[Atamara/Bisquez|Bisquez]] one of the Royal Guards approached Lavigna.She was sitting on a chair moving her feet to the sound of the music and singing...it was obvious that she had too much 7-up... | ||
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:Lavigna threw the 7-up on Finegus face and then he threw him the bottle as well | :Lavigna threw the 7-up on Finegus face and then he threw him the bottle as well | ||
| − | :"Oh... I just never was good in aiming. But then again...neither do you right? Hahahahaha. Don't worry, this is the only liquid you could come in contact with. We surely don't intend to wash you, even if I bet this would be the worst torture for a goater." | + | :"Oh... I just never was good in aiming. But then again... neither do you right? Hahahahaha. Don't worry, this is the only liquid you could come in contact with. We surely don't intend to wash you, even if I bet this would be the worst torture for a goater." |
:She then turned to the guards, "Prepare the sarcophagus please." | :She then turned to the guards, "Prepare the sarcophagus please." | ||
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:The sarcophagus was practically like a coffin of metal. The part of the front was facing the Holy Fire of Sigrid and in the inner part it was full of red hot needles that would enter every part of his body; except the hands that were left out. So instead of closing the sarcophagus from in front, the back part was pushed towards the front one causing pain and burns nothing could match as the needles wouldn't only burn the skin but the body from within as well. His hand were left out and 2 of the guards were taking care of the fingers, breaking them one by one every time the sarcophagus stooped to close. Finegus face was also tied up, in a way that implemented him to shout, since shouting is a way of dealing with pain... and was released only when ready to talk. | :The sarcophagus was practically like a coffin of metal. The part of the front was facing the Holy Fire of Sigrid and in the inner part it was full of red hot needles that would enter every part of his body; except the hands that were left out. So instead of closing the sarcophagus from in front, the back part was pushed towards the front one causing pain and burns nothing could match as the needles wouldn't only burn the skin but the body from within as well. His hand were left out and 2 of the guards were taking care of the fingers, breaking them one by one every time the sarcophagus stooped to close. Finegus face was also tied up, in a way that implemented him to shout, since shouting is a way of dealing with pain... and was released only when ready to talk. | ||
| − | :When Finegus | + | :When Finegus spat everything his brain could handle to reveal, Lavigna approached him, grabbed his face and looked him directly in they eyes. Her eyes were on fire. |
:"We haven't finished here Finegus. You will be kept in the dungeons till you confess your attempt of assassination to me so your banishment papers can be prepared. | :"We haven't finished here Finegus. You will be kept in the dungeons till you confess your attempt of assassination to me so your banishment papers can be prepared. | ||
| − | :"Trust me Finegus, you prefer a ban on your head, than another second in this dungeon. I am fed up with your invasion in our lands and I will personally hunt you down from now on. | + | :"Trust me Finegus, you prefer a ban on your head, than another second in this dungeon. I am fed up with your invasion in our lands and I will personally hunt you down from now on." |
:She pushed away his face with her hand but Finegus was out of strength to even hold his head straight and watch her leaving. | :She pushed away his face with her hand but Finegus was out of strength to even hold his head straight and watch her leaving. | ||
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}} | }} | ||
| − | {{Template: | + | {{Template:Darka_large_left| |
title = Finegus caught!| | title = Finegus caught!| | ||
| − | + | date = 17 December| | |
| − | + | article = Just hours after lowly infiltrator [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]] attempted to take [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]]'s life, Lavigna's guards arrested Finegus as he tried to leave Eurotan. Lavigna has already expressed her intention to torture Finegus and she will keep her word. Finegus will not leave [[Darka]]'s dungeons unharmed. Only [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] can save him now, but I don't think Sigrid will waste her time on a [[The_Order_of_Da_Great_Goat|goat]]. | |
| − | |||
| − | Just hours after lowly infiltrator [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]] attempted to take [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]]'s life, Lavigna's guards arrested Finegus as he tried to leave Eurotan. Lavigna has already expressed her intention to torture Finegus and she will keep her word. Finegus will not leave [[Darka]]'s dungeons unharmed. Only [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] can save him now, but I don't think Sigrid will waste her time on a [[The_Order_of_Da_Great_Goat|goat]]. | ||
}} | }} | ||
| − | {{Template: | + | {{Template:Darka_large_left| |
title = Failed Assassination attempt!| | title = Failed Assassination attempt!| | ||
| − | + | date = 17 December| | |
| − | + | article = [[RedSpan]] has once again sent their infiltrators to assassinate [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]], Arch Priestess of Darka. The assassin has proven to be [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]], a lowly assassin from [[RedSpan]]. The assassination attempt took place in [[Atamara/Eurotan|Eurotan]] at night. Lady Lavigna was sleeping when she heard the sound of a twig snapping. Knowing that all her troops are asleep, Lavigna readied a dagger. She turned around to face her assassin but the shadows covered his face. After a brief clash, the assasin escaped when Lavigna's guards awoke. Sources from the secret police reveals that Finegus was behind this. | |
| − | |||
| − | [[RedSpan]] has once again sent their infiltrators to assassinate [[Galadeon_Family#Lavigna_Galadeon:Darka_.28Atamara.29|Lady Lavigna]], Arch Priestess of Darka. The assassin has proven to be [[O%27Shea_Family/Finegus|Finegus]], a lowly assassin from [[RedSpan]]. The assassination attempt took place in [[Atamara/Eurotan|Eurotan]] at night. Lady Lavigna was sleeping when she heard the sound of a twig snapping. Knowing that all her troops are asleep, Lavigna readied a dagger. She turned around to face her assassin but the shadows covered his face. After a brief clash, the assasin escaped when Lavigna's guards awoke. Sources from the secret police reveals that Finegus was behind this. | ||
Lady Lavigna has expressed her intention to torture Finegus whether he was banned or not, as the lowly infiltrator has bugged Darka for too long. Finegus, apparently, showed interest in the 200 gold bounty on Lavigna's head, proving RedSpan's greed. | Lady Lavigna has expressed her intention to torture Finegus whether he was banned or not, as the lowly infiltrator has bugged Darka for too long. Finegus, apparently, showed interest in the 200 gold bounty on Lavigna's head, proving RedSpan's greed. | ||
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| − | {{Template: | + | {{Template:Darka_large_left| |
title = High Priest of Darka!| | title = High Priest of Darka!| | ||
| − | + | date = 16 December| | |
| − | + | article = [[T-style_Family/Easy_T-style|Easy]], formerly Count of [[Atamara/Maycxal|Maycxal]], stepped down from his position to be a priest for the realm's religion, [[Darkanism]]. He was appointed High Priest of Darkanism by Founder of Darkanism Paradigm. May [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] and [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Lodril|Lodril]] bless him as he risks his life spreading their profound teachings. | |
| − | |||
| − | [[T-style_Family/Easy_T-style|Easy]], formerly Count of [[Atamara/Maycxal|Maycxal]], stepped down from his position to be a priest for the realm's religion, [[Darkanism]]. He was appointed High Priest of Darkanism by Founder of Darkanism Paradigm. May [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Sigrid|Sigrid]] and [[Darkanism/Pantheon#Lodril|Lodril]] bless him as he risks his life spreading their profound teachings. | ||
}} | }} | ||
Revision as of 13:17, 19 December 2006
 Volcanic Hot Newsletter
| ||
| Price: 1 gold | Creator: Crescent | December '06 issue |
Contents
Comments from Darkans |
|
Paradigm, Priest of Darkanism, said: "RedSpan, worshipers of goats... No human should worship a lesser being. May Sigrid release her flames upon these goat worshipers. Although... these goat worshipers are even unbefitting even for Sigrid and therefore should be thrown in the Holy Volcano so their unworthy remains cannot disturb the souls in the present and afterlife."
Yeti, Count of Wistir, said: "I find it most interesting to read the intercepted messages that Lady Lavigna sent to the rest of the realm. RedSpan seems to be a mindless place where beasts rule, much like our own Vatticus personal psyche. They constantly wave their arms in the air and beckon us to come. Then turn around and make sure their 'friends' in the area support them. Truly this is not the conduct of a brave and mighty people, but that of a small child looking to an older sibling for help. Now where is Da Goat with Da Milk for Da Kids? Da?"
Obidan, Knight of Tolhuar said on the RS war: "I think it's a trap by RS and SA to trap us on Darka's tongue and wipe it a bit clean. They surely did act in a way to...well...excite or tempt us to go to their lands, so this might very well be a conspiracy by escalating a matter to a higher level so that Darka falls."
Juan, Knight of Mayxcal, said: "As a human being trying to survive in this violent land, I feel sorry for our Redspan brethren. Nothing is more disheartening than coming home to an ugly woman. While I have never seen an unattractive female in Darka, I can only imagine the horror and frustration RedSpanians feel every night and day. All men have needs that require relief, after all. I only pray that Redspan's Nobles give proper consideration to the Goats that provide them alternative service. Selfishness towards one's partner is a cruelty Billy G. does not deserve. A little extra corn and maybe some Vaseline can go a long way in a philotherian affair. ...and be nice to the wife at home too."
Lady Lavigna, Arch Priestess of Darka, Countess of Tolhuar, said: "I believe that the terrible smell of goats has affected their brains and has transformed them in non-thinking humans, which subsequently led to their poor attempts at propaganda. They assassinated our Banker and led themselves in this war for which they begged our King to reconsider, and now they pretend to be the macho heroes that challenge us to go and fight them? Silly goats, they found as allies the sheep of their Federation and think they can be in front of our mighty army." |
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